Coram Deo Living

Yesterday when I was in a funk over realizing how far away I am from my weight loss goal, I found myself being cranky and just plain pitiful. And when someone is like that, you know what happens...anyone who's nearby picks up on it.

Back the truck up for a minute: in the morning, my quiet time was spent in the Word in the gospel of Mark. The observations that I made were about Jesus' presence and what having Him present brought or produced. For example, His presence brought a calm (when He got into the boat with the disciples); His presence brought healing (when those who were sick touched the fringe of his garment); His presence brought satisfaction (when He fed the 5000 and they were "all satisfied"). It was interesting to me to note the various ways that Jesus "touched" people's lives. I also realized that as those He encountered embraced His presence, it was obvious that they recognized who He was & became very attentive to the fact that He was present and with them.

Fast-forward to the afternoon. I came home from the gym in a defeated mood. I didn't have much time before I had to leave for a dr appt. Neal came upstairs from the office, and immediately noticed I wasn't myself. When I told him why, he said these words to me, "Are you letting it come between us?" My immediate response was, "No!" He replied, "Yes, you are." To which I replied, "Well, what exactly do you mean I'm 'letting it come between us'?" He answered, "I mean you can't enjoy my presence because you are so focused on what's on your mind."

Ouch! Of all the words, Neal could have chosen, and he just had to choose "presence"! His statement was so providentially timed given what the Spirit had revealed to me that morning in His Word, that the spiritual surgery was over in seconds...see Hebrews 4:12 if you don't understand what I mean by "spiritual surgery".

My response was simply, "You're right." I had become so self-absorbed about my dumb little problem that it was preventing me from being able to focus on my husband. So when he came up to spend a few minutes with me at lunchtime, I was unable to enjoy his presence.

It's such a picture of my relationship with the Lord. The apostle Paul would put it like this in some of his letters, "I charge you IN THE PRESENCE OF THE LORD..." If my memory serves me correctly, I believe "coram deo" is the Greek rendering for that phrase. I think he said it to add weight to whatever followed...whatever he was encouraging or instructing his readers to do. He was attempting to remind them that our God is a PRESENT God, not some far-off deity as the Bette Midler song, "God is Watching Us" might suggest.

So, the deeper question is this: If being focused on my lack of meeting my weight loss goal kept me from enjoying Neal's presence, then what might I be focusing on that's keeping me from enjoying God's presence?" He IS here; He IS with me, right now. His every name, Immanuel, means "God with us". But am I enjoying Him? If not, why not? Lord, help me to be honest with You as I answer...and help me to have spiritually-tuned ears to hear what You say to my heart.