Yada-Mama

A Healthy Church described by Greg Laurie

2010-05-19T14:07:00.002-04:00

"One of the wonderful things about a healthy church is its diversity. That in itself is a witness to a divided world. It is a powerful testimony when someone can come into an assembly of believers and see that we have set aside our differences and there is unity.It doesn't mean there is uniformity. God can take the same gift and put it in the lives of two people, and it might manifest itself a little bit differently as the Holy Spirit works through human personality.

Ephesians tells us that God has given us these gifts "for the equipping of the saints, for the work of ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ" (4:12 NKJV). Another way to translate this verse is "to equip God's people for work and His service."

The word "equip" in the original language means "to put something back to its original condition." It is also a phrase that speaks of putting a bone back into place again. The idea is that we are getting back to God's original order when we do it this way, when we function as the church ought to function."

I say AMEN to this!!

Sometimes You Just Gotta Cut the Tassles Off !

2010-02-17T13:03:00.004-05:00

Keeping things simple has never been one of my strengths. I don't know if it has to do with 1) being a "Type A" personality or 2) that I'm married to a man (who, by the way, I'm crazy in love with...in case you didn't know) who seems to have a knack for many times making things alot more complicated than what seems necessary & "his" ways have possibly rubbed off on me or 3) maybe me not knowing how to set boundaries in alot of areas & I end up saying "yes" way too much to people...which I figure probably has to do with the "Type A" thing or 4) perhaps it's my seemingly insatiable desire to express my creativity which is almost a whole other subject in itself. Who knows what the true reason is?...all I know is my life seems way more complicated than the average person!!

With that lengthy but necessary context given, here's one of my most current examples of how I simply make things way too complicated which ends up causing stress or simply adding one more thing to my already long to-do list which in turn adds CLUTTER to my over-taxed brain:

I have a lovely comforter on our bed with coordinating shams & extra large accent pillows. And yes, I'm one of those gals who loooooves & I mean loves having a fluffy bed with lots of layers & tons of various sized & shaped pillows {thud}. My husband is constantly kidding me about how if I add one more pillow to the bed it will eventually take him at least 30 minutes to take them off at night when getting ready to go to bed. Just last night we had another conflict while I was changing our sheets about me putting the pillowtop back on {thud} which he had taken off the bed while I was in the Middle East. (And why did he remove it? Because it makes him hot (insert whiny voice here). So, now I'm trying to figure out how I can keep the pillowtop on just my side without it looking wierd....& thus another dilemma & one more thing to think about {thud}. A normal person would probably just bag it up, take it to Goodwill, & be done with it but oh no, not me!)

Back to the subject at hand: ever since purchasing the bedding over 5 years ago, the extra large accent pillows have been a pain to deal with becasuse they have annoying albeit beautiful tassles on each corner which refuse to stay on. It would be over the top detail-wise (even for me!) to explain the way they were put on, so suffice it to say that almost without fail when making the bed or taking them off at night, a tassle or two would fall off. I would put them back on or Neal would supposedly fix them permanently or sometimes I'd just stick them in the nightstand so I didn't have to think about my imperfect pillows {thud}. Of course, every time I made the bed, I'd have to position the pillows correctly so the tassle-less corner or corners didn't show...which everyone knows would totally ruin "the look"! {thud, thud}

I was making my bed a few weeks ago before heading out for a Control Freaks job, and Tori, my BFF/business partner was waiting on me (so what else is new? she would say...again, all because of my lack of life simplicity!). I fussed aloud about the tassles once again as I made the bed {thud}, and she stated oh so simply, "Why don't you just take them to an alterations person? They could probably sew them so they'd stay on." Cha-ching! "Brilliant idea", I mused. She offered to take them for me to the place she uses. Even better! (I call Tori my "Girl Friday because she always seems to be taking things here & there, picking up this or that for me because I can never seem to get all my errands done.). Problem solved or so I thought.

After our job, we ran a few errands in Mint Hill (the town I live in) & I spotted an alterations place I hadn't tried, so we whipped in only to have the gal actually tell me I should be able to fix that myself & no matter how I explained it to her, she just kept saying in her cute little accent, "You can do, You can do." {thud x 10} So back to the car I walked with pillows in hand & a very annoying look on my face.

Tori had a hair appointment that day or the next...I can't quite remember, but the hairdresser is located right near the alterations place. So the perfect timing for her to drop off my increasingly time-consuming but oh so beautiful, tassle-less accent pillows. For some reason, she forgot to drop them off which eventually led to me taking them back & telling myself I would drop them off when I had my next haircut appointment {thud}(yes we go to the same girl...don't all BFFs do that???)

So with no minutes to spare, I was finally able to get to the alterations place yesterday right before my haircut. I anticipated a heavy weight being lifted momentarily as I handed over these beautiful, tassle-less & aggravating accent pillows. Definitely a wrong assumption on my part. The girl on the other side of the counter just looked at me with this very puzzled look and said in her cute little accent, "We cannot do." {thud}

It was about the time I reached my car with my 2 ton oh so beautiful, tassle-less, aggravating, annoying accent pillows in tow that I had a visual image in movie form scrolling through my mind's eye of all the brain-power, energy and time I had wasted on these pretty but totally unnecessary tassles! And suddenly, I saw with instant clarity how to solve this problem:

Remove the tassles!

Or more simply put:

Take a pair of scissors & cut those stupid little things off!!!

So what if the pillows had no tassles? They were still beautiful, I wouldn't be out any money for paying someone else to fix them (which I of course should have been able to do myself anyway or so I was told). So upon arriving back at home, I promptly retrieved my scissors & whacked the remaining tassles off. I then walked back to my bedroom, stuffed the inserts back into the cases and voila, problem truly & permanently solved!

The only thing now is....what to do with the 8 oh so beautiful tassles??? For now, they are in a baggie sitting on the dining room table headed for the upstairs closet where I keep things like this for who knows what.

As I wind this blog down, I'm pondering what the Word says about all this? The following scripture has just come to my mind which is reeeeally interesting since I've just started a small group study with a group of women and our topic of study is the fear of the Lord. Coincidence? Absolutely not.

"Better is little with the fear of the Lord, than great treasure and turmoil with it." Proverbs 15:16

P.S. you might be wondering what all those {thud}s throughout this blog are? the heavy weight that kept getting piled on me as I continued to choose complicated over simple.

The Day the Music Died

2010-01-07T13:10:00.003-05:00

Recorded and released on the American Pie album in 1971, the single was a number-one U.S. hit for four weeks in 1972. A re-release in 1991 did not chart in the U.S., but reached number 12 in the UK. The song is an abstract story surrounding "The Day the Music Died" — the 1959 plane crash that killed Buddy Holly, Ritchie Valens, The Big Bopper (Jiles Perry Richardson, Jr.), as well as the pilot, Roger Peterson. The importance of "American Pie" to America's musical and cultural heritage was recognized by the Songs of the Century education project which listed the song as the number five song of the twentieth century. (taken from Wikipedia)

As I sat down to blog today, "the day the music died" is what came into my mind. I grew up in the 70's and ironically was born the same year these famous musicians died...1959.

Today is a day of deep significance to me personally and to that of my family because 1 year ago Mom went home to heaven. She is, of course, better off, but we are still grieving over our profound loss. The loss is huge to me, and in some ways, I'm just now recognizing many of those specific losses. I guess that's how grief works...it's a process, and stages have to be moved through. There's no rushing it or slowing it down. One year ago today is the day some of the music in my life died because Mom in so many ways brought a very sweet melody to my life.

Grief comes to each of us on its own terms, and it's taken me a full year to realize in part why God gave me the hands that I have...

Mom's hands were not petite nor were they particularly "pretty", but I can recall as a little girl sitting in church looking at them and the rings she wore on them. I would trace the lines with my finger in the palms of her hands, pull her rings on and off and simply study her hands. I don't know why I did it, but now at 50 and with her gone, I am thankful for the clear picture of her hands that is etched in my memory.

As I wrote an email earlier today to my precious daughter who lives 8000 miles away from me and shared with her a little of what I'm feeling today, I looked down at my hands as I typed and realized that I have Stella's hands. And until today, I've almost loathed them because they were large with big knuckles that require me to have rings sized like that of a man (I think the big knucles come from my Dad!). Because her hands and my hands are similarly sized, the ring I inherited from her that's called a mother's ring fit perfectly. I'm wearing it on my right ring finger,today and it looks........well, I almost said "eerily" but instead I'll comfortingly (is that even a word?) like her's.

As I wrote to Blair today, I also realized how thankful I am that those big hands of Mom's were the STRONG hands that ministered to me and many others in countless ways!

-She cooked with those hands. How many thousands of meals did she prepare for her family, sick friends, greiving friends, new neighbors, church potluck dinners, etc, etc. etc???
-She wrote with those hands. How many thousands of letters and encouragement cards and sympathy cards did she write? Her handwriting was never pretty, but she wrote anyway and always filling her letters and notes with scripture. I don't think I EVER got anything from her that didn't have a specific scripture written in it.
-She comforted with those hands. How many times did she wipe away my tears and cup my face when I was discouraged? How many times did I see her take the hands of another person and say, "Let me pray for you right now." and watch her pray?
-She pointed with those hands. She didn't point with accusation nor did she point judgmentally. She pointed, metaphorically, to Jesus because her hands were always busy doing the work of the Father. She never wanted to take any of His glory for herself. Her life was always about pointing others to Jesus.

So, sweet Jesus, would You tell her for me that I love those big 'ole hands of her's and am hoping these big 'ole hands of mine can live up to her example?!

"Stella...worked with willing hands...with the fruit of her hands Stella planted a vineyard...Stella put her hands to the distaff & Stella's hands held the spindle. Stella opened her hand to the poor and reached out her hands to the needy..Give Stella the fruit of her hands, and let Stella's works praise her in the gates. " Proverbs 31

sidenote: in the margin of my Bible I have written at the end of Proverbs 31,
" 1-6-09 read v. 10-31 to Mama as she lay in the bed at hospice dieing with Daddy, Sandra & Rick beside me...the day before she saw Jesus face to face."
-

Marriage Tip: Respecting Men Who Aren't Perfect by Mark Gungor

2010-01-06T12:02:00.002-05:00

Neal & I have listened to some of Mark's DVDs and laughed our heads off! Our all time favorite is when he talk about a husband's "nothing box". We've also learned a few things from him AS we laughed our heads off. His sense of humor is...well humorous to say the least!

Today's post from him is worth posting on my blog because I know it's sooo true! I struggled with this issue and I KNOW you who are wives and reading this have too. Maybe you're still there. Either way, it's a good word not only to read and say, "that was really good", but actually PUT INTO PRACTICE!

Enjoy.

"Most women are willing to show respect to their husbands, but they want the man to act respectable first. They are willing to show respect, but want their men to be worthy of it. If a woman will learn to risk respecting her man when he is not perfect, he will open his heart to her and will become pliable to change. A man needs respect to feel safe enough to open up. When he feels he is being looked up to as the "head" in a relationship, he will automatically allow his wife to become the neck — she will be able to point her man in the right direction! Women generally have no idea how much sway they have over a man. The ancient Jewish proverb says, 'The wise woman builds her house,' but 'a disgraceful wife is like decay to his bones.' A wife is either building up or tearing him down her husband. "

A Great Investment

2009-10-27T15:17:00.006-04:00

It has really hit me in a fresh way: children (& grands! :-) ) are an investment! I share that because our lives were enriched in a brand, new way on October 10, 2009.

Roman Willis Weddington made his entrance 4 days early, weighing in at 8 lb 1 oz & 20.5" long. I have no problem admitting that I am one smitten Mimi!!! I told Blair today that it feels like I've always known him...i guess that's perhaps in part because some of Roman has Blair in him as well as James, and in some strange way, it does feel like only yesterday that I was delivering her & doing all the things I'm finding myself doing for her baby now.

I am currently living life overseas alongside sweet Roman with his Mommy & Daddy, and it is such a joy & a blessing! Since they live in the faraway region of the Middle East, I am incredibly thankful for even having the ability to be here. Icing on the cake is that I get to travel back to the Y country in a few weeks with them where they live & work. I am anticipating that actually seeing where they've been the last year and a half is going to have a profound affect on me.

As I've helped care for Roman the last week and a half, God has reminded me what "investment" many times looks like...and it's not necessarily things I might think of as an investment because they just look like ordinary, day-in, day-out kind of things.

Diapering, burping & walking during the wee hours of the night are alot of what I've spent my time doing. Of course, I've also kissed on him like crazy, snuggled with him, sung to him, hummed to him, held him, & rocked him....all the things we grandmothers long to do!

Being around a new baby has taken be back to early parenting days. We were sooo young when we started our family, and yet I have NO regrets!! I loved, & I mean reeeeally LOVED being a Mommy of babies. I also loved every other stage of raising them, and yes i even mean middle school too (Neal would say otherwise about himself!).

Once we arrived overseas, and we settled into life with Roman, I found taking care of him came so naturally...even after 23 years. I was kind of surprised, but I guess it's kind of like riding a bike: once you do it, you never forget. As I rocked Roman one day, I confessed to Neal there had been several moments when I realized as it was happening that I was doing & acting & responding exactly the way my Mom did with my babies. I didn't even have to think about it. It was in the way I was expressing myself to Roman, and in the way I was holding him and in the way I was humming hymns to him. I didn't work it up or say to myself, "What should I do

now?" I just did them.

All that to say: Mom, I wish I could tell you in person. So until heaven, I'll blog about it now. Thank you for investing in me, and for investing in my babies. We are all who we are in great part because of you, and I am a Mom & a Mimi who is forever thankful for your humble example of being a woman of investment.

Baseball Trumps Scouts

2009-09-14T09:26:00.003-04:00

Haven't blogged in quite some time because quite simply, I haven't had anything to say. Wow, that sounds veeeeery wierd as I type it 'cuz I am typically one VERBOSE gal!

I continue to be in a season of experiencing many new things/changes. Alot of other things are requiring my time & brain: "Control Freaks"...the business my best friend & I started well over a year ago, but just now started moving foward with ; preparation for leaving for the Middle East to see Blair & James & our yet-to-be-born grandbaby boy, Roman! ; tieing up alot of loose ends with tasks left over from when I was so consumed with helping take care of my Mom prior to her January '09 death ; being Angela's wedding planner....those are, I suppose, the top-of-the-list things for now.

So back to today's blog. The title is strange I know. I saw something on TV this past weekend which jogged my memory about something that occurred on a Control Freaks job last week. At the time, I didn't make any spiritual connection. But the Spirit has since used it to speak to my spirit about it.

Tori & I do all kind of extra-type services in our business. Yes, we'll clean your home from top to bottom, but what we really thrive on is organizing, de-cluttering and the like. Additionally, we'll even do the dreaded task of ironing for you...all for a price, of course! Anyway, she & I were doing some ironing for our client when her children arrived home from school. As we continuned with pressing the many items she'd given us to do, the Mom, who by the way seems to be a great mother, was doing all the things a mom does when her children get home in the afternoon: asking them how their day was at school, what snack they wanted, and what the rest of the day & evening's schedule was going to be.

Here's the conversation as I recall it:

Mom: Trent, don't forget that you have ball practice tonight.

Trent: but Mom, I have Scouts...

Mom: I know sweetie, but you need to go to baseball.

Trent: So, baseball is more important than Scouts?

Mom: Participating in baseball requires that you practice. You don't practice Scouts. So baseball trumps Scouts.

I had to chuckle as I listened to their conversation as this 40 yr old Mom conversed with her 6 year old son. And I applaud her for taking the time to explain things to him in a way that he could understand. Neal & I tried to use this approach as much as possible with our children as well, so to "see" it in action in the life of another family brought back sweet memories....ok, back to the point before I go down memory lane & get myself distracted....I'm such a sentimental freak!.....

I've chewed on the concept of something "trumping" something else. My Mom, who was a big Bridge player, would use the word "trump". That's the only thought I had when pondering this word. So I looked it up online and it said in reference to cards: "-noun. cards- any playing card of a suit that for the time outranks the other suits...-verb. cards- to take with a trump. "

So the Mom, in essence, was saying to Trent, "Baseball outranks Scouts." I don't think she was saying it always does, but in this situation, at this time, it does.

Spiritually-speaking, I've been wondering about the disciplines of a godly life (for example, Bible-reading, Prayer, Bible study, Attending Church, Worship, Service...this is NOT an exhaustive list) and how they might "trump" something else (for example, sleeping, reading another book, shopping, yardwork, paying bills, the list is endless...).

As I overheard Jenna's conversation with her son, I was struck by the simplicity of the logic she used. And yet I found it to have depth as well....sort of paradoxical in a way. Simple but deep. I want to remember this simple but deep concept because I think it just might help this easily-distracted brain of mine stay on task. When faced with a decision about how to use my time wisely (and that's a BIG issue for me right now), and I'm looking at two or perhaps even more possibilities, I'll ask myself: "does this trump that?" or more to the point, "should this trump that?"

I'm amazed, considering how long I've known my Savior, at how often I'll allow other things to "trump" spending time with Him or engage in disciplines that enhance my relationship with Him. The "why" of that is something that I don't have the time to address in this blog, but He is using a wonderful Bible study called "No Other Gods: Confronting Our Modern Idols" by Kelly Minter to dig down to the root. And yes, that's endorsement for the study! It's absolutely wonderful and oh so practical!

I'll end with a practical example in hopes of making this more clear if I've muddied the waters in your brain:

Today is Monday, and I very much wanted to get to the gym and exercise, but I also needed to work on my Bible study since I didn't make time to work on it this weekend. I also felt a desire and urging to blog....and I know both the Bible study & blogging would take up most of my morning. So which do I do? It's not that I should give up exercising altogether (for Trent, that would be Scouts) nor should I give up going every Monday. Starting my week at the gym is a good thing for me, BUT TODAY, Bible study & blogging "trumped" my gym workout because living the Spirit-filled life I want requires practice....aka: He uses things like Bible study, prayer & even perhaps blogging to work Spirit-filled qualities into my life. In other words, I say I want to walk in the Spirit and live in victory, but that will only happen when I'm intentional about cooperating with His Spirit and letting Him trump lesser things.

Alot to ponder for a Monday? If so, I hope it proves spiritually beneficial.

The Priority Prayer That Changed Everything

2009-08-11T08:43:00.004-04:00

There's a book by Stormie Omartian called The Prayer That Changes Everything....I've not read it yet, but would like to do so. The prayer, however, that I'm referring to in the title of my blog is something the Lord has taken me back to in Scripture...again.

I returned to the gospel of Mark today and picked up where I left off in chapter 12. This morning I read verses 28-34 in which a scribe (those were the men who meticulously copied the scriptures by hand & were also schooled in law) asked Jesus,

"Which command is the most important of all?"

Jesus answered him,

"The most important is, 'Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.' "

For those who know about Jewish life, this particular scripture is called "The Shema". It's also recorded in Deuteronomy 6:4-9. The word "shema" is transliterated into English "hear" and means " to listen, hear with attention & interest, to understand ". According to one source I read, "The Shema expresses the essence of Jewish life, that God must be loved and obeyed at all times."

Back in the summer of 2001, I attended a women's conference. The timing of this specific conference was indeed providential because I was at an extremely low point spiritually...for alot of reasons that I won't take the time to outline. The speaker was someone I had never heard before, but I knew of her. She had written quite a few Bible studies and had a large following of people. I walked in, not really expecting anything, but God met me there in a very profound and particular way.

I can't remember what her message was about. So, you're thinking, how is it possible that God met me there in a profound way? It was through her closing prayer at the end and a dare she issued. It was an almost "off the cuff" remark or so it seemed to me. My best friend, Tori, was also there, and she doesn't remember the speaker saying this. But for me, it was as if she took a megaphone and screamed, "I dare you to ask the Lord to give you more love for Him. Do that for the next year and see what happens."

The Spirit's divinely-timed & aimed arrow pierced my heart at that moment, and my spirit cried out in an almost knee-jerk kind of response, "I'll take that dare!" because I saw in this woman something I'd never witnessed before. Even on a platform speaking before thousands, it was obvious and evident that she LOVED God with her whole being. It was the way she talked ABOUT Him, the way she talked TO Him, the JOY she exuded, the depth of understanding she had of Him and His Word. God used it all coupled with the dare she gave, and He began a brand new work in my heart.

Days turned into months as I continued to pray, "Lord, please give me more love for you." One day as I was spending time with Him, I cried out exaspperated, "Are You hearing me? Why haven't You answered my prayer?" In my spirit I heard this gentle but clear reply, "Look back." Huh? I didn't understand. "Look back over the months and see what I've been doing."

And so I did and He took me through the weeks enabling me to recall specific moments in which He'd been clearly at work in my heart as evidenced in how I had chosen to speak, react, respond, love unconditionally and on & on. I then realized all that He had been doing IN me. I was amazed and slayed in my heart. A short time later, He providentially directed me to the very scripture I'm in today and confirmed to me that the reason He was answering my prayer was because it was based upon and found in His Word!

All of the above is the easy part to share because it was such an incredible threshold for me....I had walked THROUGH a new doorway in my relationship with Him. But here I am today admitting to you and confessing to Him that I've slowly moved away from this core truth. In the busyness of life, I've become distracted and to borrow a phrase from the guy who led worship at Forest Hill this past week, "I've allowed my head to be turned by what glitters. " OUCH!!!

In the Greek, the word "important" as in "what's the most important commandment?" is "protos"....see any English word in that? Yep, PRIORITY.

I'm wondering if the scribe, the one who knew Scripture like the back of his hand, came to Jesus and essentially asked, "Jesus, how am I supposed to know what's priority? There's a ton of stuff in this book. How do I know what's the most important????" I don't know what the scribe's motive was. Often, a scribe was a Pharisee, and we know that most of them didn't like Jesus, saw Him as a threat and were always trying to trick Him with their questions. I don't know if this particular scribe was a sincere seeker or not. But let's suppse that he is. In some ways, I (and maybe you too) am like him. I've read a ton of scripture through the years. I can quote quite a bit of it too. But sometimes, knowing where to put my emphasis can become overwhelming. This speaker says this. That preacher says that. Your Sunday school teacher or your Bible study leader or small group leader or, or , or ....says something else. What's a confused Jesus follower to do?????

I hear the Spirit saying, "Go back to the HEARING"! Listen to what JESUS SAID WAS/IS "PROTOS"/PRIORITY. But remember, I nor you can love Him with all we are at all times in our own strength. It will take something supernatural, something or rather someONE striking the match in our hearts. If you're with me on this, then let's start afresh (for me again) praying and ask Him to give us more love in our hearts for Him. I dare you.

Distracted? Could mean it's time to CHANGE IT UP!

2009-08-07T11:06:00.007-04:00

If any of you out there have been waiting for the next "Jericho" blog, sorry. Obviously, I've been very "off-line" on blogging lately. I kinda feel like the ball in one of those vintage (notice I didn't say old!) game machines (for the life of me, I can't recall what it's called....so maybe I should call it old!). If I can find a picture online, I'll attach it so you know what I'm talking about.

Anyway, back to being distracted, here's the honest truth: I've been the same with my devotional time too. I can't seem to stay on task there either. It's a crazy thing because I'll go for months when I'm reading through a book of the Bible and just devouring it and gleaning so much truth and then it seems like out of the blue I'm off track and floundering to get back into a routine.

Haley & I were discussing this dilemma the other day, and she realized she had to make a major change. The pastor where we used to go to church has said many times from the pulpit, "Doing the same things the same way and expecting different results is INSANITY!" So true! Haley decided she needed a complete change in her morning routine. So she now gets up and showers, dresses, etc and heads to a nearby coffee shop to spend an hour with Jesus. She said it's been wonderful.

Guess it's time I consider what needs to change in my worn-out routine too. I've tried using an additional resource, but so far that hasn't worked either. So just as the old addage goes, "If it ain't broke, don't fix it.", so the converse is true, "If it IS broke, do fix it!" Maybe I need to change the location . Maybe not.

Maybe someone out there needed to hear that someone else is struggling. If so, I'm your girl today! And what I've come to learn through alot of years of walking with Jesus are 2 key things-

#1 He's oh so patient and longsuffering! And though I may be distracted from Him, He's absolutely not distracted from me! I continue to be "the apple of His eye" and amazingly, so are you! His "Godness" enables Him to focus on all of us fully without taking away from anyone. Simply amazing!

#2 A distracted external life is probably overflow from a distracted devotional life. This is certainly the case with me right now!

For those of you who are in a rut like me, take heart. He is FOR us and will place NEW thoughts and ideas in our brains so we can change it up. I've seen Him do this time and time again in my life. BUT, He wants me to recognize when this is happening, and then come to Him for His help.

For those of you who are not in a rut like me, praise the Lord!

Either way, it'd be great to hear some feedback so I and others can read what has worked and what hasn't. We NEED to learn from each other! That's part of the benefit of being connected to the body of Christ.

Ok, the light bulb just went off! It's called a pinball machine!!!! :-) Lord, You do have a sense of humor!!! And, see He can put NEW thoughts in our OLD brains!!!

The Journey to Jericho-part 1

2009-07-14T08:53:00.008-04:00

I'm going to tell you upfront on this one, I NEED to hear back from those of you who are reading this blog & take the dare I'm going to ultimately share with you. I blog when I feel "led" to do so, but sometimes the urging is stronger than others...this is one of those strong ones, and I think I understand in part why that is......

Neal & I continue to seek the Lord about connecting with a new church home here in Charlotte where we have lived for over 25 years....we've been on that search for almost a year now. For those who don't know me/us personally, we were members at our previous church home here in Charlotte for close to 25 years. That's a long time to worship, serve, invest & connect with the body of Christ. At times, leaving there has felt like a death or a divorce for us because this fellowship had become so much a part of us. We still have some wonderful friendships & those we continue to connnect with, but we do not have a church body we call "home" yet.

Therefore, I have no group of women that I regularly meet with currently.....that's a first for me in a very, very long time. And if you're a woman, you know how important it is to connect with other women. I was always involved... leading a Bible study, many times here at my home, and for many years I hosted a monthly women's prayer group that I called "Yada". When all that was lost, a huge void was created in my life. So, with all that said/explained, pleeeeeeease consider giving me your feedback on your Jericho journey. I need to hear from others who are walking this journey with me, some way of connecting with a group of women, even if it's via online!

Now on to the heart of the blog:
Years ago, we lived in a precious little house on Country Woods Drive....way out in the country or it was when we bought it in 1983. As God blessed us with 3 little babies, all brought home from the hospital to that house, we realized it was time to either expand this home or move. We loved where we were and decided we wanted to just stay put and add on. But much to our dismay, we found out the I-485 belt loop was going to be coming right through the middle of our kitchen!

Fast forward through alot of details, heartache & stress, and all the negotiations with the State have occurred, and they have bought our home. Being the entrepreneur that he is, my Neal decided it would be a good thing for us to buy the home back from the State since they offer it back to the homeowner first at a hugely discounted price....all they are really wanting is your land to put their road through. So that's what we did, and then we had it moved further out into the country on a piece of land, invested alot of sweat equity & put it up for sale with great anticipation that skads of buyers would be pounding at our door.

Neal had done his homework, and he felt sure that we would make a good size profit. Otherwise, we would never had attempted the project in the first place. Even on the day we moved the house, he had several of those who were working on the project express to him serious interest in purchasing the house. We felt greatly encouraged that the decision we had made was a good one.

Fast forward again, and it's now a year later. We have 2 house payments because the house hasn't sold. No sooner than the house was placed on the lot we had found, the next door neighbor decided to put his "house" on his lot too. Only the "house" was a trailer, and his form of yard art was putting cars up on blocks! Not exactly what most folks want to live next door to & see across the driveway. So we waited and waited and waited some more for a buyer that did not come. The stress poured off of us onto each other like me when I exercise with my trainer at the gym!

It's hard to remember exactly how this next part of our story unfolded...I can't recall if this idea came to Neal & I independently or jointly. I think he & I had heard a sermon on Joshua 6 which the Spirit used to speak to both of our hearts. That chapter is about the Lord giving Jericho to Joshua & the children of Israel and His instructions to them about how to bring down the gigantic walls that surrounded the city.

It's probably not difficult for you to guess what happened next. Yep, we felt that God was leading us to march around the Country Woods house once for six days and would culminate on the seventh day as we marched around the house seven times, all the while making a joyful noise unto the Lord. Did I mention that we had 3 young children at this time? So, each night after supper we would get our instruments (aka pots & pans!), make the 10 or so mile trek to the house and march. Can you only imagine what the trailer neighbor was thinking as he watched this crazy family do the absurd?!

God leads us to do some strange things, doesn't He? Sometimes His plan for our lives makes great logical sense, and sometimes it doesn't. Sometimes what He leads us to do is painful and hard and the path is rough & filled with bumps along the way. I love the way John Piper puts it, "His burden is light and His load is easy, but the call to follow Jesus IS costly.".....that's my paraphrase, not an exact quote from him. Sometimes, obeying Jesus costs our reputation, sometimes it costs us our job or a friendship or, or, or.....you fill in the blank.

The march around the Country Woods house was a big thing for us at that time in our lives. But as we mature in our relationship & walk with Him, so do the things He requires of us. Our "Jericho" will be different today than it was in 1983. He's leading me to NEW places, higher ground so to speak. How about you?

My next blog will build upon today's, so I hope you'll stick with me and keep reading and considering and pondering what your "Jericho" is and how He might be leading you to take down the walls that's keeping you from taking that which He's given you....

Remember, He told us through Peter in 2 Peter 1:3, "His divine power has granted to us ALL things that pertain to life & godliness through the knowledge of Him who called us to his own glory and excellence."

Stella

2009-07-12T22:01:00.006-04:00

She was Strong...
strength characterized her life in so many ways...strength of faith...strength in her mothering...strength of spirit...strength in her prayer life...strength in commitment to study God's word

She was Tall...
when you saw her, you immediately realized she was a tall woman...I recall as a little girl searching for her at church and looking for the tall, black-headed lady....but she wasn't just tall in physical stature, she was tall in her values...she taught me to always finish what I started, to do my best at each task, to be honest in all my dealings...old-fashioned but timeless values

She was an Encourager...
it was rare to see her without a smile on her face and something positive to share on her lips...all 3 of her children agree on one thing: she was our hero...for alot of reasons, but especially because she was always our greatest encourager, the one we could count on to always come alongside us and cheer us on

She was Loyal...
loyal to her Lord...loyal to her husband of 65 years...loyal to her role as mother, grandmother & greatmother...loyal to her church....loyal to her friends

She was Loving...
she demonstrated her love in so many ways that love characterized her entire life...I grew up in a home that was saturated with love...what a blessing

She was Adorable...
to her husband, to her children, to her grandchildren & great-grandchildren...as she shrank in stature because of the bone cancer, she grew in adorability...it's true- she older & sicker she became, the more adorable she was...I would look at her and see a woman with such an inner beauty that she simply oozed a radiance beyond anything that this world could duplicate.

Stella Welker Henson, adored by all her family for all these things & more!

Happy Birthday Mama! I love & miss you soooo much.

the Look of God + the Love of God = Speaking Truth by God

2009-07-09T08:34:00.011-04:00

Read in Mark 10 today about a remarkable encounter between Jesus & a rich man. Jesus is asked by him, "what must I do to inherit eternal life?" In other words, how do I become a true follower of You....by "true", I mean one who doesn't just give Jesus lip service but becomes a "doulos"...a bondslave...total surrender to the One he will follow all of his life with a bent to love Him more, obey Him more- not to earn his salvation, of course, but rather as proof of his true salvation/conversion.

Jesus' response is nothing short of profound. I love how the ESV puts it, "And Jesus, looking at him, loved him, and said to him..." I'm trying to imagine the Good Teacher looking into my eyes & feeling His love for me as He says the hard thing that I need to hear....wow. It blows me away to understand just how much He loves me/us....so much that He will say and continues to say what I/we need to hear, not necessarily what I/we want to hear. Because He looks with the eyes of El Roi (the name for Him as the God who sees), He sees all... such a small word to represent everything in me, in my heart, in my mind, in all of me! Can you imagine the discomfort that begins to rise up as you realize He can literally see all that's in you?! Discomfort is probably much too weak a word to describe the feeling....it would probably me more like what a criminal feels when he's been caught red-handed...busted...you know, the hand literally in the cookie jar kind of thing.

The next 2 words slay me, "loved him"....He sees all and yet He still loves....oh praise Him! Such a great picture of Romans 5:8, "but God shows His love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Thank you Jesus!

So His look & His love required that He speak the hard word to the rich man what he needed to hear & that one word was: LACK. "You lack one thing..."

I'm so thankful for a God who always speaks truth to me. No sugar-coating. He will always tell me what I need to hear. But what about mercy? oh yes, He speaks with mercy! Were it not for His mercy, He would not have sent His only Son to die for me. His mercy goes hand in hand with "loved him".

God, make me into a doulos who looks at others with eyes stamped with eternity that sees past the superficial to their heart. I can't see like You can, but because Your Spirit lives in me, You can enable me to discern things otherwise undiscernable. Help me to love others like You do and to speak truth to them....but always with mercy and with love. For Your glory I pray, amen.

Coram Deo Living

2009-06-30T19:25:00.008-04:00

Yesterday when I was in a funk over realizing how far away I am from my weight loss goal, I found myself being cranky and just plain pitiful. And when someone is like that, you know what happens...anyone who's nearby picks up on it.

Back the truck up for a minute: in the morning, my quiet time was spent in the Word in the gospel of Mark. The observations that I made were about Jesus' presence and what having Him present brought or produced. For example, His presence brought a calm (when He got into the boat with the disciples); His presence brought healing (when those who were sick touched the fringe of his garment); His presence brought satisfaction (when He fed the 5000 and they were "all satisfied"). It was interesting to me to note the various ways that Jesus "touched" people's lives. I also realized that as those He encountered embraced His presence, it was obvious that they recognized who He was & became very attentive to the fact that He was present and with them.

Fast-forward to the afternoon. I came home from the gym in a defeated mood. I didn't have much time before I had to leave for a dr appt. Neal came upstairs from the office, and immediately noticed I wasn't myself. When I told him why, he said these words to me, "Are you letting it come between us?" My immediate response was, "No!" He replied, "Yes, you are." To which I replied, "Well, what exactly do you mean I'm 'letting it come between us'?" He answered, "I mean you can't enjoy my presence because you are so focused on what's on your mind."

Ouch! Of all the words, Neal could have chosen, and he just had to choose "presence"! His statement was so providentially timed given what the Spirit had revealed to me that morning in His Word, that the spiritual surgery was over in seconds...see Hebrews 4:12 if you don't understand what I mean by "spiritual surgery".

My response was simply, "You're right." I had become so self-absorbed about my dumb little problem that it was preventing me from being able to focus on my husband. So when he came up to spend a few minutes with me at lunchtime, I was unable to enjoy his presence.

It's such a picture of my relationship with the Lord. The apostle Paul would put it like this in some of his letters, "I charge you IN THE PRESENCE OF THE LORD..." If my memory serves me correctly, I believe "coram deo" is the Greek rendering for that phrase. I think he said it to add weight to whatever followed...whatever he was encouraging or instructing his readers to do. He was attempting to remind them that our God is a PRESENT God, not some far-off deity as the Bette Midler song, "God is Watching Us" might suggest.

So, the deeper question is this: If being focused on my lack of meeting my weight loss goal kept me from enjoying Neal's presence, then what might I be focusing on that's keeping me from enjoying God's presence?" He IS here; He IS with me, right now. His every name, Immanuel, means "God with us". But am I enjoying Him? If not, why not? Lord, help me to be honest with You as I answer...and help me to have spiritually-tuned ears to hear what You say to my heart.

The Anticipation is Finally Over!

2009-06-29T17:19:00.011-04:00

I found out yesterday from Blair & James that they have finally decided on a name for Baby boy Weddington. Much thought on their part has gone into the decision.

Drum roll please................................................

My first grandbaby, my grandson, will be named Roman Willis Weddington! I love it! Even more, I love the significance behind the name.

"Willis" is after my grandfather on my Dad's side. I can't wait to research more about him to let Blair & James know what kind of a man he was.

Now for the "Roman" part of the story...

My son-in-law is a man's man, but he is also one of the most tender-hearted men I know. James is the one who came up with the name "Roman". Here's the background for his choice: it was at Trevi Fountain in Rome, Italy a number of years ago that James had some very significant time with the Lord, all centered around his growing affection for Blair. Ultimately, I guess you could say it was there in Rome that his love for Blair, who's now carrying their first child, was born....the beginning birth pangs of what would eventually be a marriage made in heaven. How fitting then that James would choose "Roman" for his first child's name, a product of what began in Rome.

Roman Willis Weddington, your Mimi anticipates God to do GREAT things through you, my boy!

(Trevi Fountain photo from freefoto.com)

Why John Piper is one of our spiritual heroes!

2009-06-26T12:16:00.002-04:00

Read the article and you'll understand why Piper is so beloved by Neal & I.

He is a humble man of God who admits when he's wrong, while at the same time demontrates a "set-apartness" that is rare.

Read & be convicted.

http://www.desiringgod.org/ResourceLibrary/TasteAndSee/ByDate/2009/4023_Why_I_Dont_Have_a_Television_and_Rarely_Go_to_Movies/

Simple Observations from Mark 6:45-52

2009-06-25T08:45:00.005-04:00

Jesus...
* made his disciples get into the boat (without Him)
He knew the storm was coming and yet He made them get into the very vehicle that would take them to the challenging place

* went up on the mountain to pray
This reminds me that Jesus is my "great high priest", the One who is continually interceding for me as I go through the storms in my life. He doesn't send me into the hard place and abandon me. Praise the Lord!

* saw that they (the disciples) were "making headway painfully"
He is El Roi, the God WHO SEES! Another reminder that He didn't abandon the disciples...He was fully aware of their painful situation. However, He knows far better than I do what I need to learn in order to become more like Him...which includes suffering & trials & "making headway painfully". Another verse comes to mind, "He learned obedience from the things He suffered." If He did, how much more so for me?

* came to them
Praise the Lord, He still comes to us at the appropriate time. For the disciples, it was His actual physical Presence. For us, He's given us the continual indwelling of His Holy Spirit. I am thankful that He allows me to "sense" His presence at times so that I am encouraged during the hard times. However, it's interesting that this account reveals that the way He chose to come to them (by walking on the water) terrified the disciples which reminds me of times when He has "come" and scared me half to death...why? because the way He chose to reveal Himself to me was unexpected and so much BIGGER than the tiny box I had put Him into. OUCH!

* spoke to them
Hearing the voice of the Lord in the midst of the storm is such a gift.

* said- 1- take heart 2- it is I 3- do not be afraid
I love what He said to the disciples. So simple yet so profound. It needs to be simple so I can comprehend and embrace what He's saying to me when life has gotten out of control from my perspective. I can't handle complicated things and neither could the "DUH-ciples". Sherri, take heart. Sherri, It is I. Sherri, don't be afraid.

* got into the boat with them
I love it! He got involved. Jesus climbs into the boat WITH them. What a truth! The very thing He used to take them to the hard place is the very place He climbs into WITH them. He is the God who gets into the painful situations WITH us. Glory!

Their reaction as recorded in the scripture in verse 51, "utterly astounded". And sadly, I think the being astounded is not because they then understood Who He was and what He could do, but just the opposite. Because verse 52 says, "for they did not understand about the loaves, but their hearts were hardened."

Just before Jesus sent the disciples out to sea in the boat is when they get to SEE Jesus perform the miracle of feeding the 5000....before their very eyes! And yet, a short time later, what they SAW made no impact on the reality of their current situation. Scripture is clear why- they had hardened hearts.

I have seen and experienced God's divine faithfulness, provision & intervention countless times in my life. And yet all too often, I too react with doubt & fear. This should NOT be. I have walked with Him for many years now, and He has proved Himself over & over. Lord, do Your heart-softening work in my heart so that I might trust You MORE and especially when I find myself "making headway painfully".

My Thankfulness List

2009-06-24T20:25:00.002-04:00

1- a husband who held things together especially during 2008 when I was virtually an absentee wife (because of children's weddings & a very sick Mom)

2- my son, Trent, who is a great husband to his wife even though he's only been married a little over a year

3- my daughter,Blair, who is persevering through alot of stress as she & her hubbie do God's work in a very faraway land

4- my daughter, Haley, who is being wise beyond her years about money matters & helped her new hubbie pay off one of his school loans...after only 9 months of marriage

5- my son-in-law, James, who is taking such good care of my daughter (who's expecting a baby boy) and brought delight to her heart by spending gads of time in every mall he could find in order to buy needed baby stuff...by himself!

6- my daughter-in-law, Ali, who adores her husband, my son! & builds him up like a godly wife should

7- my son-in-law, Lee, who makes me laugh and makes life an adventure for Haley

8- Ava, my mini-schnauzer, who is such good puppy-therapy for me!

9- our new administrative/sales assistant,Vivian, that God brought to us...clearly reminding me to be so thankful for a God who cares about the details of our lives

10- my sister who loves me kind of like a Mom does AND like a friend does AND like a sister does....she's all 3 rolled into 1!

11- for the strength that God gives for me to persevere in my areas of great weakness, bringing hope & thus the reminder that change is possible

12- for God's daily grace & peace

Another "New Beginnings" Tool

2009-06-14T17:58:00.006-04:00

One of the new spirtiual disciplines I started practicing in 2008 was choosing a very specific (& Biblical) word/phrase for the year on which to focus. My baby daughter, Haley, is the one who got me started doing this, as she learned it from her former pastor. It has been a life-changing thing for me, not because I've suddenly become super-spiritual or even mastered a certain quality or skill in a year's time. Simply put, it has given me direction for a spiritually-proned easily distracted mind.

The longer I walk with Jesus the more I realize how many wavering opinions there are to what believers think we should be concentrating on. Because His Word has told me that I HAVE His Spirit living inside of me, I can also know that same Spirit is going to teach me the things I need to learn in order to become more faithful, more obedient, more God-glorifying and so forth.

I'm not saying that I have no need of any teaching. Nothing would be further from the truth! But, what I am saying is that far too often in years past, I've allowed others to unduly influence me regarding my spiritual walk. The operative word is , "MY"!

Same goes for YOU! You have your OWN spiritual walk with Jesus, and NO person can know for sure what He wants you to focus on except Him! The catch is figuring out what it is He wants ME or He wants YOU to focus on, right? So, I'll let you in on what I believe is a "secret" to one of God's Father-like ways He uses with us, just like I used with my children (and as always, He's going to center it around His Word because He is the Word and the Word explains Himself to us) :

Here it is: He REPEATS Himself. What do I mean? I mean that when you begin going to Him and asking Him, "Lord, what do You want me to work on this year?", He will start showing you by speaking to you the same thing or slight variations of the same thing over and over and over. You'll find yourself seeing a common thread in every scripture you read. He will bring people into your life, maybe even strangers, who just happen to "mention" a spiritual nugget that is the same thing you've been seeing in His Word. Your pastor will preach on it; or maybe your SS teacher or small group leader will talk about it.

Speaking of repeated things, ever notice how many times the gospel writers included Jesus' words, "He who has ears to hear, let him hear." Jesus IS speaking, but am I, are you listenin'? Go to Him, and tell Him you want to hear Him more, and hear Him more clearly, I believe His Word teaches us that's the prayer He is eagerly waiting to answer!

p.s. don't get side-tracked by the fact that it's June and NOT the start of a new calendar year...that's definitely a distracting strategy of the defeated one! instead, think outside that calendar box! Since July is the start of the 2nd half of the year, pray over the last few weeks of June, asking Him to show you what to focus on for the rest of 2009. I'd LOVE to hear feedback from those of you who begin practicing this new discipline & hear what God's teaching you!

p.s.s. to give you a personal example of what I'm talking about: my word for 2008 was "contentment"....and for those who know me well, I know you would heartily agree, this word was indeed a challenge for me with almost more changes than I can list occuring in that year... God knew what was coming and what was ahead, so He, by design, directed me to become firmly grounded in finding contentment, no matter how rocky my circumstances became...; my word, actually, words for 2009 are "submit with joy"...I'll wait for another blog to elaborate on this one...oh yea, it's been another challenging year!

"E-Day"

2009-06-11T13:57:00.005-04:00

What could be more exciting than 2 people making the decision to spend the rest of their lives together as husband & wife?! I would say getting engaged is 2nd only to giving your heart & life to Jesus, your 1st bridegroom. Having a baby would be #3 on my list. Having a grandbaby would tie for 3rd!

Today is a GLORIOUS day because Angela Elrod & Matt Tucker are about to get engaged...in fact, it's so close to happening that I can hardly type! What fun it's been to be "in" on the planning, and how fooled Angela is! Hooray, mission accomplished!

Angela is a very special young woman in my life because God has given me the joy and privilege of mentoring her. As time passed and we continued to meet, the Lord orchestrated that Matt and my Neal start meeting as well. Their mentoring looks alot different than mine and Ang's, but that's perfectly ok.

I have to say that I've come to realize that mentoring is much like raising children because you are intentionally investing in someone, knowing that all the time you are spending WILL reap good results. Rewarding? Absolutely! And, to be a small part of Matt & Angela's special day is just one more perk to the investment.

Mama Hopper loves you both like crazy, and I am sooooooooooooooooooooo happy for you! Let the wedding planning begin!....or should I say CONTINUE, Angela????! LOL! :-)

More Lessons on Dieing

2009-06-09T17:34:00.005-04:00

I had a sweet time with little Nod last night before heading to bed. He was very chirpy and full of life. So, how & why in the world did he die in my hand this morning? I woke up to find him very listless. I tried and tried to get water in him. He would open his little beak some and swallow a tiny bit, but as seconds ticked away, I could literally see the life leaving him.

What did I do wrong? I thought I was being a very attentive "Mommy" to this little one, but for reasons I don't understand nor do I particularly like right now, Baby bird Nod just stopped breathing.

Ava and I took him to what is becoming our pet cemetery, where Lizzie is buried and now Nod along with his sibling that we found already dead on Saturday. And, we had another funeral. I was skyping with Blair today, and for some reason, she wanted to know if I said anything or did I just bury him. My response was, "Even in my great sadness, I simply thanked the Father that His Word tells me that He cares that this little one fell to the ground and later died, and because I know He cared about Nod, I can know that He not only cares about me, but He loves me. "

And again I am reminded by the death of Nod that God loves me....so much so that He did so unto death on a cross. I sense that for some unknown reason, I am going to need to know in the days ahead the DEPTH of God's love for me. So for now, I'll tuck this lesson in the pocket of my heart & treasure it.

A Luke 12:6-7 weekend

2009-06-07T16:34:00.006-04:00

"Are not five sparrows sold for two cents? Yet not one of them is forgotten before God. Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Do not fear; you are more valuable than many sparrows. " Luke 12:6-7

Yesterday was a yard working day for me and Neal...all day long. It was truly wonderful to be outside, sweating and getting dirty. We both loooove working outside, and getting to spend the entire day outdoors is such a gift!

While Neal continued to put the old tin on his shed roof, I was out front raking when I saw a tiny bird in the driveway. My heart dropped as I realized he was already dead. I gently picked him up and made my way to the back yard where our precious Lizzie girl is buried. Ava (my mini-schnauzer) and I had a short, little funeral for this tiny, seemingly insignificant creature. And yes, for those of you who know what a tender heart I have for animals, I cried.

I cried not only because I was sad that this sweet little bird's life was cut short, but because His Word tells me that my BIG God cares about the small things, even about the life & death of this little bird. Matthew's gospel states it this way, (Matthew 10:29) "Are not two sparrows sold for a cent? And yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father." He not only knew & saw, but God cared that this little one fell to the ground!

As I dug the small hole and laid him in it wrapped in little leaves to keep the dirt off of him, the Spirit reminded me of the part of the verse that says, "you are MORE valuabe than many sparrows." When I stop to truly ponder what the verse is telling me, I am simply astounded at the depth of His love for someone such as myself.

As Neal and I have continued our search for a new church home, God has been gracious to remind me over and over just how much He loves me through the taking of the Lord's Supper... about 5 or 6 times now! Today, the Spirit "connected the dots" for me in this thick head of mine! Take this bread and this cup and REMEMBER! Remember that He loved me so much that He laid down His life and died for me! Thank you Jesus for taking the penalty of MY sin onto Yourself so that I could have free access to my Father God, live for Him now and spend eternity with Him after I leave this earth. And to think He used a tiny, little bird to remind me of such an enormous and tremendous truth! Amen? Amen!

P.S. Guess what ELSE my Big God did for me? Later in the afternoon yesterday, He gave me another gift. Trent found bird #2 in the driveway, but this time, this little one was still alive! Praise the Lord! So, you guessed it, we now have a precious little bird we are nursing back to health, and we've dubbed him "Nod". Oh how I love being a "mama", even to one of God's tiny little "sparrows"!

Do you have YOUR armor on?

2009-05-19T08:30:00.003-04:00

I have a friend who is going through a heavy-duty season of "spiritual warfare". If you think that's weird or just something that doesn't happen anymore, think again! And, read 2 Corinthians 10:3-4 that says,

"For though we walk in the flesh, we are not waging war according to the flesh. For the weapons of our WARFARE are not of the flesh but have divine power to destroy strongholds."

There is a WAR going on. The question is, do you even care? And, are you engaged in the battle or simply on the sidelines? My admission to you is that there have been times that I have sat on the sidelines because I just didn't want to deal with the "heavy" stuff. Thankfully, my God is so patient with me! And in His sovereign-like way, He simply orchestrates my life such that I am confronted with things that stretch me.

As Neal and I have been made aware of the situation in our friend's life, the Spirit has used it to remind me of some very important spiritual skills that I need to be practicing daily. And, even though I had a godly Mom who lived this very principle out before me, I had foolishly discarded what is a fundamental & foundational skill for every believer/follower of Jesus...which is:

PUT MY SPIRITUAL ARMOR ON INTENTIONALLY & DAILY!

The way God made me aware of my neglect of this skill was through a recent conversation with my friend who had also been asked the question, "Did you put your armor on today?" To which she answered, "What do you mean? I always have my armor on?" To which the response came, "No! You must put it on daily." He then instructed her and her husband to have a specific time each morning in which together they put their armor on. As my friend and I talked, the Spirit reminded me of the passage in Ephesians 6 that outlines all the armor but even more signifcantly the words, "PUT ON..."

I've studied this passage many times, but being the "DUH-sciple" that I am, I tend to forget many important truths! And that is, "put on" is in the PRESENT tense. In other words, when Paul penned these words, the Spirit who lived in him and was doing the inspiring of the words he was penning was intentional when He prompted Paul to write "put on" which means keep on putting on. It is NOT a one time thing! So, now I have my Biblical basis for putting my armor on daily. What next, Lord?

He gave me the opportunity to have a conversation with my youngest daughter on Mother's Day as we were driving back from Atlanta to Charlotte. She was having a tough moment...well really weekend. She's newly married, and....well enough said. As she and I talked, the Spirit prompted me to issue Haley a challenge and one that I would join in with her to do. I told her I wanted her to be intentional about putting her spiritual armor on everyday for the next 30 days and I would also be doing this with her. I told her I would text message her every morning to remind her. So, since the Monday after Mother's Day, she and I have been dressing ourselves for war.

Yesterday's text to Haley that the Spirit gave me said, "Cover my Haley today, Lord, with all You have given to equip her...her S helmet; her R breastplate; her T belt; her F shield; her W sword...all to READY HER FEET TO SWIFTLY SHARE YOUR GOSPEL OF PEACE WITH THOSE YOU BRING INTO HER LIFE."

If none or very little of the above makes sense to you, maybe it's time you read or re-read Ephesians 6:10-18.

I dare you.

p.s on 31 Things I Loved About Mom

2009-05-11T15:50:00.002-04:00

I was sharing today with a friend that I had blogged about Mom on Saturday in order to "take my thoughts captive" and how it ended up being 31 things. Her very insightful & quick reply was, " Well of course! After all, your Mom was a Proverbs 31 lady!"

Wow!

The funny part about the 31 things is, I wrote simply as memories quickly came to my mind. At 30, I thought I was finished, so I published my post and laid my head back to take a short nap. Then another memory came racing into my mind as clear as a bell. So I promptly added it and changed the number to 31. God, you are soooo good!

31 Things I Loved about Mom

2009-05-09T16:07:00.009-04:00

I won't know until the end of this blog what number to put in the title....because there are just so many good memories of Mom...

Since it's Mother's Day weekend, and I am "home" in Atlanta spending time with my sweet Daddy, I have to be intentional about "taking my thoughts captive" & then Philippians 4:8-ing since it would be so natural to go down the sadness path....because I miss Mom so much. Instead, I want to remember the good things.

Here goes...

1) I loved how she laid out a new outfit on my bed that she bought me while I was at school..this was early on when she knew what I liked & there was no conflict in fashion tastes!

2) I loved that she planned a surprise baby shower for me in Atlanta when I was pregnant with Haley....no one expects a baby shower on their third baby!

3) I loved that she "taught" me to love coffee and loved to talk over a cup...somehow, it just seemed to make the conversation better.

4) I loved how she cooked, even on busy Sundays...there's just no aroma quite like a rump roast in the oven when you open the back door after getting home from church.

5) I loved how she took over my kitchen when she came to visit me in Charlotte, and how she always came with her famous strawberry cake & pasta salad in tow.

6) I loved how she grew to love our dogs...Kelly, Maggie, Lizzie & Ava, not because she was a dog lover because she wasn't, but because she knew her daughter was!

7) I loved how she knew when to stop and rest, even when there was still lots left to do.

8) I loved that she worked in the yard and knew how to mow the grass and even enjoyed it...this woman was not afraid of hard work!

9) I loved how she was always willing to lend a hand on WHATEVER project I had lined up for the weekend when they were visiting. She did it all!

10) I loved how we used to go shopping when my airline pilot Daddy was flying on a trip, even in the middle of the week and on a school night for me.

11) I loved how she always got up with me for school and had Morton "little donuts" and some o.j. waiting on me for breakfast.

12) I loved how she cooked everyone's favorite food on Thanksgiving & Christmas, no matter how big the family kept growing.

13) I loved how she called me her "sunshine".

14) I loved how she laughed, and that she could NEVER remember the punchline to a joke!

15) I loved that she worked the newspaper crossword puzzle everyday for as long as I can remember.

16) I loved that she enjoyed being around all kinds of people and demonstrated that in alot of ways. One of those ways- she was in 3 "bridge clubs": the neighborhood women, the Eastern women & the church couples.

17) I loved how much fun we had planning my wedding. I don't remember one single disagreement between us....we may have had one or two, but I don't remember that we did.

18) I loved that she always came to Charlotte when I had a baby and stayed the week after.

19) I loved that she taught me to love God's Word.

20) I loved that she was a stay-at-home Mom.

21) I loved that she taught young marrieds long after she was one!

22) I loved that she mentored women.

23) I loved that she surprised us all when she bought a snazzy red T-bird when she was in her 60's.

24) I loved how she said, "Thank you Jesus for the parking place" before she found it, and that she truly had a grateful heart, even for the "small" things.

25) I loved how she loved my Daddy.

26) I loved growing up, going to Grayton Beach, Florida with her and all her girlfriends every summer...I can still hear all of them "cackling" as they played bridge well after midnight.

27) I loved that she loved the beach and would get in the ocean, even though she didn't know how to swim.

28) I loved how she made me finish whatever I started...even when I wanted to quit drill team tryouts in the 10th grade, she said absolutely not for which I am so grateful....because being on drill team was undoubtedly one of the highlights of my entire 5 highschool years at Riverwood.

29) I loved that she didn't care what people thought & that she wasn't afraid to walk down the church aisle in her 30s AFTER she was a Sunday school teacher & the wife of a deacon, and say, "I need to be saved."

30) I loved how she loved me.

31) I loved that she was a great Mom, even though her Mom died when she was a baby. I loved her response when I asked her one day how she became such a good Mama...she just shrugged her shoulders & gave credit where credit was due, "The Lord taught me."

I love & miss you Mom! Happy Mother's Day in Heaven!

A New Beginning: Choose to Forgive

2009-05-07T09:27:00.003-04:00

As I continue to grieve over the loss of my sweet Mom (she's been in heaven 4 months today), I have been greatly encouraged by a ministry called Griefshare. I receive daily emails from them that have been so helpful in the PROCESS of grieving. Today's email is about forgiveness.

It suddenly occured to me that UNforgiveness is a huge issue for many people which got me to wondering if there's someone out there who needs a "new beginning" in the area of forgiveness. I am convinced this is one of the defeated one's (satan's) most successful arenas: to keep us from forgiving and thus keep us paralyzed in our walk/relationship with Jesus. Therefore, I've simply copied & pasted today's selection because it's just too good not to share...

"Forgiveness is getting your heart right with God by making the choice to forgive others and by receiving His forgiveness. Forgiveness does not mean you are relieving someone of responsibility for his or her actions. Forgiveness does not necessarily mean you trust that person. Forgiveness is the act of letting God's love flow through you.

Think about the above definition for a moment.

Doug Easterday says, "You're not alleviating responsibility from anyone by forgiving them. You are transferring it to where it really belongs and that's with God. They will answer to God someday, but if you're requiring them to answer to you, then you have as big a problem as they do.

'Forgiveness is obedience to God.'

Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, 'Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?' Jesus answered, 'I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times'" (Matthew 18:21-22).

Lord, it is only by Your power that I can forgive. Keep me from destroying myself with unforgiveness. Amen."

Boasting in my weakness & Delighting in His Word- part 1

2009-05-05T08:19:00.010-04:00

A week ago today, I shared with the women of Lakeview Baptist what God had laid on my heart over the course of several months. Their theme for the banquet, NOT chosen by me, was "New Beginnings"....this theme has been my life experience for the most part over the last year and a half and I shared w/ them close to a dozen things in which God has either orchestrated or allowed into my life forcing me to say "goodbye" and presenting me with the opportunity to have a new beginning. By the way, doing the goodbyes of life is something I really stink at!! I'm one of those who is always looking back to the past and remembering it with rose-colored glasses.

God has shown me through this process of allowing so many changes into my life how very weak I am. Years ago, when I was teaching Precept classes at my local church and sitting under the teaching (via video) of Kay Arthur, she would share an example that has stuck with me to this day, and it "fits" here...when we're jostled by challenging lifes circumstances, whatever our glass is FULL OF, will spill out the top.

Am I full of bitterness? Then, that's what comes spilling out. Am I full of fear? Then, that's what will spill out. What about being full of self?...just another name for pride. Or prejudice? The list is endless. Conversely, if I am full of joy, then that's what spills out....or peace or contentment or....you get the idea. Before you dismiss the metaphor, realize that this concept is definitely supported in scripture. So if you esteem God's word, then you need to listen:
~In Proverbs 23:7 , I'm told that, "For as a man thinks within himself, so he is."
~In Proverbs 4:23, I read, "Watch over your heart with all diligence, for from it FLOW the springs of life.".
~Jesus spoke of this many times in scripture. One example is found in Matthew 12:34b- "For the mouth speaks out of that which FILLS the heart."

In other words, what my mind dwells on I will eventually live out.

Ok, so back to being weak. As I've been "jostled" by life (that my God is sovereign over!...He in in control of it all!), weakness is what has spilled out the top. And I'm here to tell you, coming face to face with your weaknesses is no fun. My natural instinct is to justify, give reasons, etc, etc on why I'm this or that way....or I try to compensate by focusing on my strengths. Neither is the way Jesus desires me to respond to this "unveiling". When I respond in my flesh, I "quench" the Spirit working in my heart. I put the fire out, and then I wonder why I have no power in my spiritual life....funny how I conveniently never make the connection!

About 2 months ago, in the midst of beginning preparations for speaking at Lakeview, God provided me with an opportunity to see what I believe is my greatest weakness and what I call "the ugly" in my life. What was the "opportunity"? Neal and I had a HUGE fight....can't even recall what it was about now, but it was a biggie. I know because God used it to show me "the ugly" which is my resistance to Neal's authority...something I have always struggled against since day 1 of our marriage. For years, I would say things like, "I just have a strong personality" or other equally lame comments. But, this day was different I believe because God had been tendering my heart through the study of His word. The soil was tilled and ready for seed.

Here's what I wrote the morning after the fight:

"God's grace is sufficient. Neal & I had a huge fight last night, reminding both of us once again how carnal we can be and ultimately, how we can bring out the worst in each other when we permit that carnality to take over. This is and seems to be the biggest spiritual wekaness I have in this life. When I woke up this morning, my first thoughts turned to the scripture in 2 Corinthians 12:9-10 which I had meditated on yesterday...coincidence? I think not. Paul stated that God gave him a 'thorn in the flesh'. I wrote in the margin of my Bible-' the who of P's thorn: satan's harrassing messenger; they why of P's thorn: to keep him from being conceited'. Several things come to mind as I ponder over this today-
1- Neal is at times a "thorn" in my flesh because he has the power to bring out the worst in me and expose my weakness(es)
2-Even though it is Neal who is at times used as a thorn, I know that satan/the defeated one is the one who is "behind" the harrassment
3-The "thorny" messenger caused Paul's weakness(es) to become evident to him. God said that His power is perfected in weakness. So Paul's response to this was, 'Therefore, I will BOAST all the more gladly of my weakness, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.' Not only that, but he went on to say, 'For the sake of Christ the, I am CONTENT with weaknesses...For when I am weak, then I am strong.' "

That's alot of MEAT to chew on! So, I'll stop blogging for now...more on this subject in my next blog. Stay tuned....meanwhile, why not go to the Lord and ask Him, "What am I FULL of?" I promise you, He will show you. Go ahead. I dare you.

p.s. my Neal also has the ability to bring out the BEST in me....just so you know.

"Sophronizo" (mentoring ministry)

2009-04-30T16:04:00.003-04:00

~a Greek word found in the New Testament of the Bible in the book of Titus meaning "to admonish, to recall to ones senses." Titus 2:3-5 is a mandate for mentoring, specifically that "older" women are to teach & train "young" women.

2009 is the year God ushered my precious Mom home with Him in Heaven. Her "mantle" has been passed onto her children, grandchildren and great-grandhcildren. As one of her daughters, He has burdened my heart to carry on what she did, both intentionally & simply as a lifestyle:

~be a teacher of good...literally, a teacher of what is beautiful~

I am still praying through the details of what this ministry will "look" like...

Somehow God has used me over the last 20+ years to encourage and (sort of) mentor various women He has brought into my life...at times, I was floundering spiritually myself because I was still a young wife & Mom. By His grace, perhaps they gained something spiritually beneficial. Today, I am currently mentoring a young woman one on one that God brought into my life, and we have been meeting together weekly since last fall. It is the highlight of my week. I LOVE coming alongside women in this capacity!

Now, as I near age 50, He has given me a desire to invest in more women's lives and to share what my godly Mom taught me with other women. I don't know if there will be an age criteria...but I think probably so since Titus says the older are to teach the younger, but I want to study this more & pray about it further. As a "new beginning", I am in the process of writing the material I believe the Lord would have me to share with the women He brings.

Additionally to having one-on-one time with women, I want to have a group time (not sure on frequency but maybe once a month?) when we would meet together...this will be called "Stella Group"...in honor & memory of Mom...simply a time to encourage one another as women who are seeking to walk faithfully with Jesus and hear about success as well as failures! I believe in AUTHENTICITY!

There are still alot of gaps to be filled, but if He's in it, He will fill them!Pray & seek His guidance.And if your heart connects with wanting to know more, please contact me.

ToolBox for a New Beginning

2009-04-30T10:32:00.014-04:00

This past Tuesday evening, I had the joy to speak to a group of sweet ladies at Lakeview Baptist in Monroe NC for their spring women's banquet. The theme for what I shared about was called "New Beginnings"....something I have become VERY familiar with over the last couple of years and even more so in 2008 & the beginning of 2009 due to the large number of significant changes in my life and in the life of my immediate family.

As a follow-up to Tuesday night, I let the women know that I would be sharing some thoughts that the Lord gives me on my blog including a "toolbox"....tools that I have found helpful for myself and for them to consider using as they seek to apply what the Spirit spoke to them about regarding having a new beginning as it relates to their greatest weakness.

I want to share 2 "tools" in this blog. I'll share more as the Lord prompts me to do so. And, I'll add a "toolbox" sidebar to my blog that lists the tools for easy reference that includes the blog date if you want to read the fuller explanation.

Tool #1:
A new Bible
This tool really only applies to you if you've had your Bible for a long time. In other words, it's well used and marked up. If that description fits you, this idea is worth considering! What I've found is that it is very easy to become too familiar with my Bible...huh, you're saying?! How can a person become too familiar with their Bible? By leaning on the notes and markings I've already written such that I no longer listen to the Spirit for a new application of a particular passage's truth.

Additionally, because spiritual growth is a process, we are (hopefully!) always changing. That means we're growing in knowledge; therefore, what we needed when we first came to know Jesus isn't the same as when we've been walking with Him for awhile and certainly not what we need as a seasoned follower of Him. In earlier days, a person may need a more readable translation, but it may be what's called a paraphrase (i.e. The Message or the Living Bible in which the writers took the original words and put them into their own words and focus heavily on making it relevant) or a "thought for thought" Bible translation (i.e NIV in which phrases are taken and translated from the original manuscripts...this also helps make it more readable for today's reader) instead of a "word for word" translation (i.e. NAS or ESV which is the most accurate since each word is translated one word at a time from the original manuscripts).

As God grows us up in Him, just as a baby moves from milk to solid food to meat, so we as believers need a change in our spiritual diet. With the age of the internet and an abundance of Christian bookstores, we all have a wealth of resources to avail ourself of...if we really want the information!

Tool #2
A classic devotional book like Streams in the Desert
by Mrs. Charles Cowman
Sometimes, we all need a little help in our quiet time (the specific time you've chosed to set aside every day to spend with the Lord reading & praying). The only exception I know personally is my husband, Neal, who is what I call a "purist"...he, for the most part, only uses his Bible for his quiet time. Always has, probably always will. He does keep our Strongs or Holman's concordance handy (I'll probably blog at some point on the benefits to using a concordance.) I agree with him that for the most part, we need to spend most of our time with "straight Bible", but I also know that a devotional can be a huge source of encouragement and growth in my spiritual life. Streams in the Desert is one of those profound books that I have read again and again, year after year, and the Spirit continues to use it to sharpen me. It is available in an updated edition in almost any bookstore, probably even a secular bookstore like Barnes & Noble or Borders. I personally love the older editions, and search for them on Ebay and in used bookstores wherever I travel because I love giving them away to people.

By the way, this devotional was my Mom's all-time favorite. A older, godly woman gave her a copy when she was a young wife & Mom, and it stayed with her Bible & all the things she used regularly for her quiet time up until the time of her departure to heaven in January of this year at the age of 83.

I love this phrase from the April 30th's selection and have been "chewing" on it all day:

"The living God is still in the heavens

and

even to delay is part of His goodness."

Wow...see what I mean about being sharpened?!

************************************************************************************

Women of Lakeview that attended the banquet:

Thank you so much for giving me the opportunity to share with you. I would LOVE to hear from you, and how taking the 40 day Psalm 1 challenge/dare is going and how I can pray for you. I plan to blog soon writing out a summary of what I shared so that you have that for reference...because sometimes we agree to do something and then down the road we really can forget why...I want you to have the core Biblical truths available so that the Spirit can keep that fire in your heart lit for Him!

P.S. please don't let the enemy succeed in discouraging with tempting thoughts such as "i missed a day praying & asking the Lord to give me a delight for His word, so I might as well give up." No...just pick right up again & continue on! I cannot wait to hear how He uses the next 40 days (or however long it takes you to do 40 days worth of asking!)!

Encouragement for the weary from Psalm 138:7

2009-04-23T15:32:00.004-04:00

Every where I turn in recent days, friends & family are in great distress for a variety of reasons. The thought came to me just now as I shared the following with them that I must put these words on my blog to encourage any out there who are also struggling. May the Lord's Spirit strengthen all the weary for His glory!

" 'Though I walk in the midst of trouble, thou WILL revive me.' Ps. 138:7
~The Hebrew rendering of the above is “go on in the CENTER of trouble.” What descriptive words! We have called on God in the day of trouble; we have pleaded His promise of deliverance but no deliverance has been given; the enemy has continued oppressing until we were in the very thick of the fight, in the center of trouble. Why then trouble the Master any further? When Martha said, “Lord, if thou hadst been here my brother had not died.” Our Lord met her lack of hope with His further promise of, “Thy brother shall rise again.” And when we walk “in the center of trouble” and are tempted to think like Martha that the time of deliverance is past, He meets us too with a promise from His Word. “Though I walk in the midst of trouble, thou will revive me.” Though His answer has so long delayed, though we may still continue to “go on” in the midst of trouble, “the center of trouble” is the place where He revives, not the place where He fails us. When in the hopeless place, the continued hopeless place, is the very time when He will stretch forth His hand against the wrath of our enemies and perfect that which concerneth us, the very time when He will make the attack to cease and fail and come to an end. What occasion is there then for fainting? "

From Streams in the Desert by Mrs. Charles E. Cowman, April 23 selection

Have you learned to "meditate" Biblically? I pray so! More on that subject later........

(BTW-Streams in the Desert is my ALL TIME favorite devotional and one my godly Mom read all of her adult life; I never grow tired of it, and God has used it over and over to sharpen me! If you don't have a copy, I encourage you to get one and try to get the older edition because the more current ones have been edited for supposed clarity but I think much is lost in the editing process. Go on ebay and/or check out used bookstores. Everywhere I travel when I find a used bookstore, I look for copies so I can have them to give away!)

Homesick

2009-04-20T21:39:00.002-04:00

A sweet friend shared the following youtube link with me a few months ago in an effort to bring a measure of comfort in the loss of my precious Mom.

For those of you reading this now who knew Jim Sikes and are hurting and missing him so, I pray this song leads you to the "Balm of Gilead", Who alone can heal our grieving hearts.

"Mercy Me - Homesick with lyrics"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=doaHIOXIhH0

A Tribute to a man who could bring order out of chaos

2009-04-16T22:20:00.002-04:00

We've only known him and his wife for about 7 years, but it seems like so much longer...i think in part because they were part of the "flock" we led at our former church home, and this group became like family to us. Something about being bound together in Christ that sticks like glue. Seven years....such a short time relative to a lifetime and certainly so relative to eternity.

Because he was a retired military guy, he used all kinds of crazy army-lingo. This simply made us love him more. He was the most disciplined person I think I've ever met....he was everything my husband isn't, and yet that fact didn't threaten my Neal nor make me think less of my husband. He was just soooooo "Jim". He was the kind of man who you knew you would want to go into a battle with you...my Neal called him one of his "mighty men" and one of his "Aarons".

Neal taught our former SS class for over 15 years, and it was bittersweet to minister like we used to as a husband and wife team...we visited with his wife this past Monday in ICU. Jim lay in the hospital bed with all kinds of things hooked up to him, Neal prayed over him one last time & confessed to the Lord, "I couldn't have done what I did without him doing what he did." And oh, how well he did what he did! He helped bring order to the chaos of two very unqualified SS leaders who stumbled and bumbled our way through ministering. We were better leaders because of him, and I believe we were a better class because of him too.

Ruthann, his wife, shared a note with me that he had placed in her new day planner than he got for her at the first of this year. It says, "To my love, I have given you my time as God alloted, and you have given me the time of my life! Love, Jim". Wow. It seems as if he knew, and yet how could he????

Colonel James Sikes, "one who brought order from chaos", you will be greatly missed!

My Stella Tree & Stella Chanticleer

2009-04-09T13:00:00.004-04:00

Our former SS class sweetly gave me a very generous gift certificate to a greenhouse/nursery to purchase something in memory of Mom/Memama. Neal and I went to the nursery in early February, but I simply wasn’t ready to make a decision. I wanted it to be just the “right” thing. We returned a few weeks ago and found the perfect “Stella tree”…a curly willow… so unique just like Mom. It’s planted in the backyard where our “someday patio” will be. I know I’m going to enjoy seeing it grow for many years to come. And I imagine sharing much about her legacy w/ my grandbabies someday.

We also purchased a “quirky” chanticleer (aka: a rooster!) at the nursery w/ some leftover gift certificate money. Some of you may remember how Mom often referred to herself as a “tough old bird” because nothing ever seemed to get her down! Nothing ever did, not even cancer! It may have taken her physical life, but the joke is on the defeated one because “though she’s dead, she STILL speaks!” (Hebrews)! This “bird” just seemed to scream or more aptly “crow” MOM, so it has also found its place in our front yard.

Since Neal took the photo, I’ve added a sign I found on a recent treasure hunt (incidentally, the same one I bought for her a few months before she died to put outside her den window) that has the phrase that characterized her life...how appropriate that the rooster’s head is thrown back boldly crowing, “Praise the Lord!”

My James 5:16 Man

2009-04-03T18:47:00.004-04:00

He amazes me. His perseverance in prayer slays me. Most middle -of -the-nights, he can be found on the sofa in the family room...praying...interceding...seeking the mind of his God...experiencing "yada" intimacy with Jesus.

He used to love his sleep, but he asked Him to make him more of a pray-er. He answered. Now when he is awakened for any reason, he assumes it's his wakeup call to pray. He says he's heard the Father whisper, "Come talk with me." I believe him.

I wonder what mountains have been moved, what strongholds demolished, what healing has been given, what situations resolved, what victories won as he's bowed the knee countless nights...for his children...and their spouses, for his "former flock" that he led for over 15 years as their Sunday school teacher, for his extended family, for the prodigals he's known, for his church and its leaders.....and gratefully, for his wife....THIS wife....

My Neal...my James 5:16 man.

A HUGE God "Mommy Moment"

2009-03-12T14:13:00.005-04:00

We all talk about having a God moment, a moment in time when the God of the universe reaches down and touches us personally in some meaningful way, and it reminds us that He loves us, He is in control no matter that the circumstances are screaming otherwise and He does care about the DETAILS of our lives! Oh, how I love that about Him!!!

Last night I went to First Baptist Church-Kings Mountain with Angela, the precious young woman I'm mentoring right now. She was invited there by one of G.A. (Girls in Actions for those who weren't raised Baptist) leaders. The leader is the Mom of one of Angela's dear friends. Since this was an opportunity for a "Real Live Missionary" (aka RLM) to be in their midst, they included all of the G.A. classes to come, ranging from 1st through 6th grade. There were between 25 and 30 girls there.

Angela did a wonderful job sharing with these girls about what it takes to become an RLM: love God with all of your heart so that you can hear Him when He "calls" and then obey, be willing to try new things like living in another culture & learn a new language & finally, pray for those you are being a missionary to because without the Holy Spirit's work in a person's heartt, they cannot be open to receiving Jesus. What a blessing to hear a young woman of 26 share from her heart these Biblical insights, knowing she has already given 2 1/2 years of her life and even plans to go back overseas at some point to do more work.

It was simply amazing to sit there and realize that God would use Angela's testimony as she scattered the seed across those young, fertile hearts! Angela may never know this side of heaven what her specific impact was, but someday in Heaven or on the New Earth, I imagine that a woman or women will come up to her and say, "Hey, do you remember when you came to speak to a group of girls on March11, 2009?....."

All of the above was a big enough blessing, but God chose to pour Himself out on ME in such a profound and personal way that I could scarely take it in as it was happening. I'll explain...

On Tuesday of this week, I had a very hard morning when I was missing Blair & Haley, my 2 daughters who don't live in Charlotte. Blair is overseas serving as a "worker", and I've not seen her since October of 2008, and then, only for a few days. She and her husband James left for the N.A.M.E. region in April of 2008. Blair is expecting their first baby, my first grandbaby which makes it even harder not to have her close. I will not likely see her before October of this year, a full year or more since the last time.

Haley lives in Wilmington NC with her new husband. Although she's not terribly far away, we don't get to see one another except about every 2-3 months. For a Mama who has lived just about her entire married life raising kids, I still have moments when I'd give anything to go back in time when they were younger. I truly loved and love being a Mom!

While driving the car on Tuesday morning to do a "Control Freaks" job with my partner and best friend, I was listening to a Bebo Norman CD, and the song, "A Page is Turned" came on. I was immediately transported in my mind back to 2006 when Blair & I were planning her wedding. We were working on the music and what songs would be sung, etc. She got out her IPOD and we sat on the sofa together, her with one earplug in and me with the other.

I distinctly recall crying as I listened that day to that beautiful ballad, knowing how short my time was with her before her Daddy would walk her down that church aisle. As I listened to the song in the car, you can probably guess what happened......the tears started streaming down my cheeks. I called her on my cell on their Skype number, but didn't get her. So I left a message.

Then I called Haley, who I knew was at work, but I just wanted to hear her voice on her voicemail. And then I left her a message also, letting her know how much I love and miss her too. Thankfully, I had a very busy day planned, and the rest of my day was filled with purpose-filled work. I was so grateful. Nothing like staying busy to distract the mind!

Now, fast forward to Wednesday night at First Baptist Church- Kings Mountain. At about the middle point of Angela sharing with the G.A.s, she anticipated they would probably get antcy, so she had wisely planned for each of them to come up to the front where she would write their name in Arabic on a card that they could keep. They were thrilled!

As the girls began lining up, Julie (the mom who invited Angela) called out several names to remind them it was their turn. I was just sitting there on the back row taking it all in when I heard her call out "Blair". Because Julie has met my Blair and knew she was my daughter, she made a point to tell me, "We have a Blair too." I thought to myself, "That's really neat." And then I thought about how faithful G.A. leaders at the church we were a part of for close to 25 years had probably played a key role in preparing my Blair's heart to do the work He's called her to do alongside of James. Wow. Thanks God. You are so precious to speak to my heart. And thank you so much for those leaders!

That too would have been a big enough blessing, but that's not the end of the story. The girls continued lining up, and since there were quite a few for Angela to do, it took about 10 minutes. And then I heard Julie call out another name....but when she said it, I thought to myself, "Did she just say....surely not! I must be WANTING to hear..." So I whispered for her to come over and asked her, "Julie, what is the name of that little girl in the pink shirt in the row in front of me, the one sitting right NEXT to Blair?" She nonchalantly said, "Haley".

Does ANYONE else out there have "big hair" (my Blair's name for goosebumps, glory bumps, etc) besides me?! Oh glory! Hallelujah! In my house, we call these kinds of moments "Sigmund Hoppers"...(that will have to be for another blog), but suffice it to say this was a gigantic Sigmund Hopper for this gal, and I KNEW that I KNEW that I KNEW that MY God understood how much I was hurting the day before and missing my daughters...my Blair and my Haley. So He lovingly reached that mighty but oh so tender arm of His down to one of His daughters and simply blew her away!!!

P.S. It was the middle of the night where Blair lives, so I couldn't call her, but I did call Haley afterwards to share what had happended. She was so precious to say, "Oh Mommy, guess what color shirt I have on tonight?" Any guesses???!! "PINK!" I say GLORY & PRAISE THE LORD!

The View From Stella's Chair

2009-03-06T20:16:00.012-05:00

Tonight I'm sitting in my Mom's chair...the one she sat in alot through the years, but especially so during her last year of life on this earth...because she really had no other choice due to the bone cancer that slowly but surely stole her life away.

I'm in Atlanta visiting with my precious Daddy...the first time "home" since Mom's death. It's been bitter-sweet to be here....bitter because I came home to the house at 5225 Vernon Springs Trail (the home I grew up in from 1965 until I got married in 1981, and the house my parents have lived in since moving to Atlanta in 1965), and SHE was not here to greet me as she had always done before...even if only from sitting in her chair near the back door. Not hearing " Hey darlin' " is another "loss"....one that I hadn't identified until Wednesday upon arriving. (Is it any wonder I use " Darlin' " as a term of endearment with my own children as well as others in my life that are precious to me?!)

I've been busy since being here...spending quality time with Daddy talking and catching up, helping him buy a new dryer, being with my Big Sis who drove in Thursday so she and I could work on sorting Mom's things. But late this afternoon, all the activity finally stopped. And so I sat in her chair and began to look around. This is what I saw:

*her PRAISE THE LORD pillow *
It sits on the sofa directly across the room. It reminds me of Mom's "Praise the Lord" mantra and how I grew up under the tutelage of a mother who didn't just have a positive outlook, but one that gave God credit in all things and during both good and hard times. It also reminds me that she invested in others because the pillow was a gift from Boo, a very dear friend and also a woman Mom mentored.

* the pillow that says "The Lord is my Strength and my Song. Exodus 15:2" *
I actually gave this to her sometime after she was diagnosed with cancer. I told her it was to be her focal point....like when a woman who's about to give birth chooses something to focus on during the pain to keep her mind centered on the purpose. It has a ribbon attached to it, so I hung it at the end of the mantle closest to her on one of the hooks that stays there and is used for stocking at Christmastime. She told me on several occasions how much it had helped her during the really pain-filled days. Jim Wood, a former pastor at her church, had stopped by one Sunday during the summer to encourage Mom and Dad. He's the one who used the childbirth analogy. I've never forgotten those insigthful words and how much Mom was strengthened by them as he reminded her to keep fighting the good fight, running the race and enduring the pain because it indeed had a purpose, just like a mother giving birth to her child. Wow.

* the cross-stitched "JESUS" sign *
It sits on top of the entertainment center. It doesn't "go" with anything as far as decor goes. But quite frankly, my Mom didn't care. I'm not saying she didn't know how to decorate her home well or that she didn't care that her home looked nice. She did, but it wasn't an obsession. She loved her Jesus, and she wasn't ashamed to let everyone who came into her house know that.

* her book stand that holds her Bible and all time favorite devotional, Streams in the Desert *
She sat in her chair every morning for as long as I can remember and spent time with her Jesus, reading His word and talking to Him. The devotional book was a gift from a godly woman she knew in Charlotte. Both her Bible and the devotional are well-worn.

To borrow a phrase from Beth Moore, her "private praise matched her public praise"...meaning, Mom didn't "act" like she was godly....she truly was because of the changes that took place each morning as she allowed God's Word to do its transforming in her heart.

Another NEW beginning as "Mimi"

2009-02-22T13:00:00.007-05:00

"MOMMY!!!! That word seems to mean so much more to me, even now!...
I just want to talk to you and catch up even more now that the word is spreading...."

These are the words penned today by my darling Blair as she emailed me this morning.....
she who is now carrying our FIRST grandchild!

OMG!!!! The fact that I'm going to be a "Mimi" (aka grandmama) is still sinking in from hearing the news yesterday morning from Blair & James on Skype! For those who know me well, you KNOW I lived up to my crazy & passionate reputation! I screamed with DELIGHT, threw up my hands, jumped out of my chair and ran around the house hollaring like a raving maniac! James' commentary....."nice victory lap"......yes, oh yes indeed it was!

Trent's response as I roused him from a deep slumber (he & his wife Ali are living with us temporarily while they look for a house)....since he could easily determine that his Mom's screams were of a happy nature, he leaned down through the laundry chute that drops into the laundry room where Neal and I were on the pc talking to James and Blair....."What in the world?! Is Blair pregnant?" He just knew that his Mom could only be this overjoyed over something reeeeeally significant!

Could God's timing not be MORE perfect?! As I've been grieving over the profound loss of Mom the last 6 weeks, He has in His oh so God-like way & timing brought me "joy in the morning" over something NEW. Out of death, comes life! Glory!

Father, like my Neal, I am so humbled that You would choose to save me, much less keep on sanctifying me, much less bless me with a precious husband, 3 wonderful children with 3 wonderful spouses and NOW, a grandbaby! It's almost more than we can comprehend! Thank You for this blessing, for this child of Your's! May I be diligent to pray for this baby, and may he or she bring You MUCH GLORY through his or her life. You have astounded me with the demonstration of Your love as I continue to grieve and miss Mom. I can't help but believe after all I'm reading in Randy Alcorn's devotional 50 Days of Heaven that Mom not only knows that her granddaughter is expecting, but she is also doing what she always did here on earth....praising the Lord! Praise YOU Lord!

Weekend Gleanings from Hebrews 11

2009-02-17T07:54:00.003-05:00

PRESENT & ACTIVE FAITH…

THAT IS:
PRESENT & ACTIVE "ASSURANCE OF THINGS HOPED FOR" &
THE PRESENT & ACTIVE "CONVICTION OF THINGS NOT SEEN" (Heb. 11:1)….
AS SEEN FROM HEBREWS Chapter 11…
WHAT FAITH CAN PRODUCE (look like in my life) AT VARIOUS TIMES & SEASONS IN MY LIFE PRODUCED BY HIM BUT REQUIRES MY PARTICIPATION-

FAITH UNDERSTANDS, V3
FAITH OFFERS, V4
FAITH SPEAKS, V4
FAITH TAKES US UP, V5
FAITH PLEASES (GOD), V6
FAITH CONSTRUCTS, V7
FAITH OBEYS, V8
FAITH GOES, V9
FAITH LOOKS FORWARD, V10
FAITH BRINGS POWER, V11
FAITH CONSIDERS (HIM FAITHFUL), V11
FAITH SEES & GREETS (FROM AFAR), V13
FAITH ACKNOWLEDGES (EXILESHIP FROM THIS EARTH), V13
FAITH SEEKS (A HOMELAND), V14
FAITH DESIRES (A BETTER COUNTRY, A HEAVENLY ONE), V 16
FAITH OFFERS UP (OUR ISSACS), V 17
FAITH ACTS (BASED ON GOD’S CHARACTER), V19
FAITH INVOKES (FUTURE BLESSINGS), V20,21
FAITH INSTRUCTS, V22
FAITH DOES THE RISKY, V23
FAITH REFUSES, V24
FAITH MAKES CHOICES, V25
FAITH CONSIDERS (REPROACH AS A REWARD), V26
FAITH LEAVES (Egypt), V27
FAITH ENDURES, V27
FAITH SEES (THE GOD WHO IS INVISIBLE), V27
FAITH KEEPS, V28
FAITH CROSSES OVER (OUR RED SEAS), V29
FAITH MARCHES & SHOUTS, V30 (see also Joshua 6)
FAITH GIVES, V31
FAITH CONQUERS (KINGDOMS), V33
FAITH ENFORCES (JUSTICE), V33
FAITH OBTAINS (PROMISES), V33
FAITH STOPS (THE LIONS’ MOUTHS), V33
FAITH QUENCHES (THE POWER OF FIRE), V34
FAITH ESCAPES (THE EDGE OF THE SWORD), V34
FAITH MAKES STRONG (OUT OF WEAKNESS), V 34…..GLORY!
FAITH BECOMES MIGHTY (IN WAR), V34
FAITH PUTS TO FLIGHT (FOREIGN ARMIES), V34
FAITH INCLUDES (SUFFERING), V35-38
FAITH REFUSES (THE SHORT TERM RELIEF IN ORDER TO BE RAISED AGAIN TO A BETTER LIFE!) V 35

Stella Therapy

2009-02-09T09:57:00.010-05:00

I NEED to keep talking about Mom. I now understand why grief support groups can be so helpful.....those of us who are grieving cannot just "move on", not without working THROUGH our grief. And so I blog....

February 7th (a month to the day that she went home to Jesus) came & went, and I had hoped to accomplish something "significant" in memory of Mom...something to make her proud...although proud is not the word she would want me to use because she believed and taught me that pride, any pride, is relying on self instead of God....so let me say that I simply wanted to her to be "pleased" & "blessed".....

Neal & I went to a nursery/greenhouse to look at plants & trees & such on Saturday, and it was so good to be outside in the sunshine....oh, how Mom loved to be outside and loved the sunshine. Each day in her journal, she started out with a notation about the weather giving the temperature and whether it was sunny, clear, cloudy, etc....such a funny thing to me that she would notice and write this information down. But then again, it makes perfect sense to me now that I look back and remember how much of her time was simply spent sitting in her chair as she looked out her sliding glass doors every day because she could do little else, given the advancement of the bone cancer.

Have I mentioned that Mom was once a very tall woman? She was about 5'9" originally. She'd shrunk a little over the last 10 or so years due to osteoperosis, but nothing like what happened when the cancer took over. We received a mailed report from her primary care doctor after she died, and it showed that she was only 5' the last time he saw her.....astounding that cancer can steal so much from you physically! Praise God, it didn't steal her joy or her peace or her faith or her "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" attitude!

So, what did I end up doing on Saturday? Not much, except for having a gloriously, stress-free day with my Neal doing a few errands together. It was late afternoon when we finally got back home, but I wanted to plant some pansies & stonecrop perennials around the mailbox....the sun was already going down, but I just wanted to get my hands in the dirt. So, I took my spade and cleaned out the old to make room for the new and got alot of good, rich dirt under my fingernails....I just don't like to wear gloves when I'm planting...too constricting.

The evening was so lovely, I didn't want to go inside even though it was starting to get cool. I shouldn't have stayed out so long because I've been sick, but I longed to spend a little quiet time thinking about Mom. So I made my way to the bench under the big oak tree in our front yard and sat down. The moon was almost full and unbelieveably bright & beautiful. I just couldn't quit looking at it nor stop thinking about "here" is not where she is anymore and trying to comprehend just "where" it is that she is...yes, I know that she's in heaven, but exactly where is heaven located...yes, I know in the heavenlies, but again alot of what we say is so vague....bear with me as I simply wonder about all these things.....

And, as I sat there pondering, I recalled how she would do this funny little game when I was young, mostly when we traveled in the car, about the moon.....she'd say, "the moon, the moon, the big round moon, two eyes, a nose and a mouth" and as she said the words, she would trace in the air with her finger. And, as I reminisced about that, I could have sworn that I saw a faint outline of Mom's face there in the "face" of the moon.....it probably wasn't there, and was only something I wanted to see, but it made me grin just the same. And as I sat there enjoying the glorious night that God had provided. that's when I realized I was probably doing exactly what would have brought pleasure to Mom (or maybe it actually did?!)...I took the time to be awed by my God, as Creator, & His magnificent handiwork. Yea, I think if Mom had been in Charlotte visiting, she'd have been sitting right beside me , enJOYing it all as much as me.

Grief-work

2009-01-28T11:16:00.004-05:00

She's been home in heaven 3 weeks today, and I still can't fully grasp or comprehend Mom's death. Grief is a completely new experience for me, and it is TOTALLY consuming. Monday, I came to unexpectedly realize that she's not here anymore as my daily & faithful intercessor- the one who I KNEW prayed everyday for me....what a HUGE loss this is to me!

I recall thinking during her last days at hospice, "the prayer warrior is now being prayed for"- oh, how Mom prayed for others!......God, will I EVER be able to pray like her, given how much I'm hurting right now?! Today, I don't think so, but perhaps one "tomorrow" a long, long way off I will believe differently.

"The death of a loved one is a mortal wound, difficult to grasp and impossible to understand. It is UNASKED for, UNPLANNED for, and UNWANTED....Because of the depth of the wound, even one's own self becomes unfamiliar. Time assumes a different meaning, and nothing that was once important matters any longer....Grief knows no time limits....No two wounds are identical, so the healing rates will differ. Each person's emotional bandage is unique."
From When Will I Stop Hurting" by June Cerza Kolf

Words of Encouragement in a Season of Grief

2009-01-21T16:31:00.005-05:00

So many precious friends have been sending me words of encouragement during this season of the loss of my Mom- some in the form of emails and some in the form of sympathy cards...today I received a card from Harry & Debbie Hooks and another from Carolyn Turner...both of these cards ministered to my sad heart.....additionally my sweet long-distance friend, Kim Tucker shared some words of counsel recently that have really helped me.

For anyone else out their grieving over the loss of someone very important to you, I pray these words soothe your aching soul like a salve on a wound....

"God's Gift of Time"

"We all need a time to grieve-
a quiet time for reflection
to sift through precious memories
and come to grips
with what has happened.
We all need a time to let the tears flow,
not for the ones we lost,
who are at peace in heaven, (hallelujah!)
but for ourselves as we realize
that things will be different now.
We all need a time to just 'be,'
when we can open ourselves to God
and let the reassurance
of His everlasting love
start to heal our broken hearts."

"Imagine
stepping onto a shore and finding it heaven
Imagine
taking hold of a hand and finding it God's hand
Imagine
breathing new air and finding it celestial air
Imagine
feeling invigorated and finding it immortality
Imagine
passing from storm & tempest to an unknown calm
Imagine
waking and finding it home -"

Wow! One card ministered to me about ME. And the other ministered to me about MOM. Both are precious! Thank you Harry & Debbie and Carolyn!

Kim shared the following words about her observations when her sweet husband lost his Dad. She said,

"Grief came in waves at unexpected moments for him as well as the moments you would expect it to...Grief will have its way with you one way or another...I can only speak from that experience, but it seems best to just not expect too much of yourself or your dad and just let it have its way. No apologies to anyone!! "

Thank you Kim for giving me permission to continue grieving. You have ALWAYS been a blessing to me, and I'll never forget the wonderful memories we made together at HGBC many years ago!

Not surprisingly, God's word speaks so accurately about the use of words....

"...how delightful is a timely word." Proverbs 15:23b

"Pleasant words are a honeycomb,

sweet to the soul and healing to the bones." Proverbs 16:24

Those verses remind me of Mom becasuse she was truly a Proverbs 31 woman who, "opened her mouth in wisdom, and the teaching of kindness was on her tongue." Countless friends have shared with me and others in my family how much Mom encouraged them with her words and especially through her teaching.

Now that she's gone "home to heaven", how precious of my God to send others my way in her stead to share words of encouragement. Oh Lord, help me to be this kind of woman, EVEN AS I GRIEVE!

An Unexpected Moment with Daddy

2009-01-13T22:13:00.003-05:00

My Neal suggested a few weeks ago that I select a special song on my cell phone for my Daddy so I would easily know when he was calling. After thinking on it and searching for awhile, I chose "In the Mood"....such a great "big band" song and so representative of him and the WWII generation that he's a part of.

Tonight I asked Daddy if I had shared "his cell phone ring" with him and he said no. So I played it for him. When I realized he couldn't hear it from across the room, I walked over to him to get closer. As I did, his eyes lit up as he recognized the familiar tune. And the next thing I knew, he and I were up and dancing a jig together in the family room! What a moment! What a gift in the midst of such astounding & current grief!

I just had to gloat to Sandra (my older sister who's also here in Atlanta with me) and yelled, "Sandra! Daddy and I are dancing and you're not!".....she and I have been having fun pretending we have sibling rivalry....something we never really experienced since she's 13 years older and was always like a "mama" to me....but later in life once I was married, we simply became the best of friends. She came running and had a look of pretend jealousy on her face. Then Daddy said, "I bet Stella is turning over in her grave!" referring to the fact that he was never much of a dancer.

I wouldn't take a million dollars for that surprise moment with him because after walking this past year with Mom, I now KNOW first-hand how important it is to make the most of the time we have with those we love!

Praise the Lord lyrics by Haley Hopper Jock

2009-01-13T13:51:00.004-05:00

God has entrusted my baby girl, Haley, with an amazing song-writing ability, and through Mom's departure to heaven was given yet another opportunity to magnify His great name & honor her Memama's memory....I wanted to share the lyrics with everyone. For those who attended the funeral, I know you were blessed to hear Haley sing & play the piano during the family remembrances time. I would ask that you pray that God would take this song and if it His will, provided an open door to be used in a greater way to inspire and woo others to Jesus.

Praise the Lord

Oh Lord, I praise You
because You made her so wonderfully
Oh Lord, You knew her unborn frame
You knew everyday ordained

We walk, we struggle,
we lift our eyes to the hills,
and we say Praise the Lord!

Praise the Lord
Oh my soul,
Praise the Lord!

Oh Lord, You satisfy the years
wipe away all the tears
Oh Lord, how blessed was she
heart-set on the road towards Thee

She walked, she struggled,
she'd lift her eyes to the hills,
and she'd say Praise the Lord!

Praise the Lord,
Oh my soul,
Praise the Lord!

The generation to come will know
even the children yet to be born
that You are God- You are King
because she never failed to sing...

Praise the Lord, Praise the Lord,
Oh my soul, Praise the Lord!

She praised the Lord,
She Praised the Lord,
she's finally home,
Praise the Lord!

How to get close to Stella/Memama

2009-01-12T16:40:00.003-05:00

Please go to Blair's (my middle child) blog to read what she wrote for her Memama. Neal read it at the graveside, and it was astounding how well what the Lord gave her fit with what Jim Wood shared. She has a very unique perspective since she lives on the other side of the world as a "worker" with her husband sharing the gospel.

Please see: http://web.me.com/jamesandblair/Site/Blog/Blog.html

For those who might be interested in hearing from Blair and James on a monthly basis to hear about what God is doing in their lives and how He is using them in the Arab world, please feel free to email them at jamesandblair@pobox.com to receive their newsletter.

More Stella Moments

2009-01-11T20:45:00.012-05:00

I tried to post a blog last night but my internet connection went down in the middle of writing...so here goes another try.

Mom's funeral yesterday was NO funeral...it was a celebration of her life and a worship service to Jesus. Much glory was given to our King, and it was just as I believe Mom would have desired. It IS possible to grieve with JOY! And doing so doesn't take a thing a way from how much we love Mom and miss her. I continue to have "Memoments" (a word my son Trent has coined for Memama or Memom to some of her older grandkids....precious!), moments when I reflect on the many wonderful memories that have been shared with me over the last few days....here is one of them:

My daughter, Haley, wrote her Memama a song in her memory the day after Mom left for heaven. She sang and played it at the service yesterday. It was such a tribute to what Mom was known for- PRAISING THE LORD in all circumstances . Thus, Haley entitled the song, "Praise the Lord" (I'll share the lyrics from her song in a separate blog). I was sharing about Haley writing the song with Boo (a good friend of Mom's) on Friday and she shared this story that just "fits" so well.

Many years ago, Boo gave Mom a white pillow that has stayed on the sofa in their den. "Praise the Lord" is written across the front of it. On the few Sundays this past year that Mom was able to muster enough strength to go to church, she would attend service only and take the pillow along to put behind her back. One particular Sunday Mom came to church without Boo knowing it in advance. But because Boo sings in the choir, she was able to spot her fairly quickly. When their eyes caught one another, she said Mom slowly lifted her arms above her head and in her hands was that wonderful pillow with PRAISE THE LORD being lifted high for all to see! I couldn't help but think of this story the next day as I read Streams in the Desert (one of Mom's all time favorite devotionals that I also read regularly). The reading for the day spoke of Jehovah-Nissi, the Lord is our BANNER. What a testimony to this great name of God as Mom lifted high her banner: Praise the Lord!

What else can I say but Praise the Lord?!

More Stella Moments

2009-01-10T22:55:00.007-05:00

The service for Mom was truly a celebration of a life well-lived investing in people, all for God's glory. Our focus was on the Lord, and I know this is what Mom wanted. The gospel was clearly presented, and every person who attended is now accountable for what they heard...and that includes me!

I along with my sister and brother have BIG shoes to fill if we want to do Mom's legacy justice. This is where my thoughts lie tonight as I sit tonight pondering. So many precious people came to pay their respects and share some of their personal experiences with Mom. Here are a few:

* A woman I believe named Cathy (I can't recall her last name) came up to me at the funeral home and said how much Mom had meant to her. Back when this woman was in her 20's, Mom would meet her for breakfast at McDonalds. Cathy was struggling with some heavy issues, and she said Mom helped her through a very difficult time in her life to help get her back on the right track with the Lord. From what I could tell from my conversation with Cathy, it appeared that she is a woman who loves Jesus and is living for Him. Praise the Lord!

* A woman named Lisa shared with me at the funeral home that she had been greatly impacted by Mom. I didn't recognize her though she had gone to the same highschool I did in Sandy Springs (a suburb of Atlanta). I wondered if she had been in one of the many Sunday school classes Mom had taught or perhaps sung in the choir and got to know her there. No, that was not the case. She went on to explain that Mom's influence was indirect but powerful nonetheless. You see, this woman Lisa is being mentored by another woman. That woman's name is Boo Elliott. And Boo Elliott was mentored by my Mom. My Neal was standing beside me as she shared this with me. He leaned in close to her and said, "And who are you going to mentor?" Her reply..."Right now, that would be my 14 year old daughter." As Neal put it so well, "Isn't that the way it's supposed to work?!" I agree and say Praise the Lord!

* A man named Rob shared with me how much he had gleaned from Mom. He also shared that there was such a "softness" about her that simply captured him. This man had been through a divorce, and Mom had loved him in them midst of and through that hard time in his life. Praise the Lord!

* Another man named Monty was taught by Mom and her co-teacher Ferrell Ryan. They taught "young marrieds". Monty is now teaching a Sunday school class and told me today that everyone in his class knows who Stella is, though none of them knew her personally because he's now serving in another church and quotes her frequently as he teaches. That really excites me because I know that what my Mom taught and quoted was the WORD OF GOD. Therefore, Monty's students are hearing TRUTHS from God's Word which is the only thing that's worth quoting! Praise the Lord!

* The same Ferrell Ryan mentioned above shared with me that Mom was the first person to come visit he and his wife when they moved to Atlanta many decades ago. The really interesting part of his story is that the Ryans were living in an apartment while their home was being built, and Mom indeed come to those apartments. But she had come to visit another family but knocked on the wrong apartment door....or did she? I say no and praise the Lord!

More Stella moments in upcoming blogs.........praise the Lord for His goodness to me and my family as He continues to minister to us in the midst of our grief!

Stella Moments Continued

2009-01-08T00:01:00.005-05:00

Moment #2-

A sacred Stella Moment:

Today (Wednesday, January 7th) my Mama went to be with the Lord surrounded by her husband, 3 children and their spouses. We had all wanted to be there, and God orchestrated that it be so. We are so grateful. I pray I never forget the details of this glorious, bittersweet day.

My precious Daddy has struggled from the beginning of his beloved's bone cancer diagnosis last February. He told me this past Sunday when Mama was still in the hospital that he would hold out until the end asking the Lord for His healing of her battered & diseased body. He was true to his word.

Sometime around 3 pm today, subtle changes began to occur in Mom, and my Daddy picked up on them instantly. His spirit was so in tune to her's and I think he knew what was about to happen in the next hour. He began pouring his heart out to the Lord, continuing to plead with God for her life. When her breaths had more and more seconds between them, he would take that giant hand of his and gently lay it on her chest and say, "Breathe Stella, please breathe." And she would. I am convinced she did just that because he was asking her to....it took everything in her to do so. How torn she must have been as her sweetheart pleaded with her to stay here, but her beloved Jesus was telling her it was time to come home! It makes me think of the apostle Paul's description of himself being "hard-pressed" about whether to go to heaven or stay for the benefit of those who needed to be ministered to by him...

The hospice chaplain, Elizabeth, came in to the room and discerned in Dad the intense struggle he was having with letting Mama go. She acknowledged that understanding to him, and asked if it would be ok for her to pray for Stella to be able to run to Jesus if this was "her time". He pondered over her question and then slowly but definitely said yes......though I know how much he wanted to say no.

I believe God used Elizabeth's prayer to lead him to the next step. After she exited quietly from the room to give us family time, Daddy began praying over her. And as he did, I felt compelled to open my eyes and fully embrace what was occuring and about to occur.....as my precious Daddy labored in prayer for his Stella, she opened her eyes and looked straight into her beloved's face......it was one of the most sacred moments I've ever experienced! Glory!

It was such a gift to see her look into his eyes on this side of heaven one last time. I couldn't help but think about the fact that Mom didn't have a fancy wedding or even get to be escorted down a church aisle when she married Daddy 65 years ago. They simply went to the preacher's house and got married. BUT today, her beloved husband surely escorted her down the path and to the very gates of heaven as he prayed her there! Glory again!

Daddy said "amen" and a few short breaths later, she left this world, "finished her course" (2 Timothy 4:7) and arrived in "the city, which has foundations, whose architect and builder is God" (Hebrews 11:10). Glory x 3!

Stella Moments

2009-01-06T20:24:00.008-05:00

Tonight I'm sitting at Altus House...a hospice house where my sweet Mama is spending her last days on this side of heaven. As a family, we've had so many wonderful moments together with her...moments I don't think I'll ever forget....nor would I want to, even as difficult as all this is to go through.

Moment #1:

Stella Bear

My sweet Blair cannot be here in person to tell her "Memama" goodbye because she along with her hubbie James live very far away in the Middle East as workers for the Lord...as she said, "this is the first person that I'm losing that I've had a close relationship with and I don't know how to deal with it." As Blair's Mama, my heart is heavy and want to do all I can to come alongside her to help her in the grieving process. So He has faithfully provided me a tangible way to do that...

On the way back to Charlotte a few days ago (when we had been in Atlanta seeing family and then all of the events regarding Mama started), we stopped at a Cracker Barrel. While there, I saw some precious little brown teddy bears that had been put out for Valentines Day. I'm a real sucker for cute stuffed animals, but didn't really have a reason to purchase one. So I resisted the urge to get one.

My best friend Tori and I were heading back to Atlanta this past Sunday since my Neal was unable to leave quite yet in order to be here with me. I was sharing with her about my Blair and how my heart longed to do something to help her as she grieved. Somewhere about Greenville, the idea hit me and I know it was from the Lord........stop at Cracker Barrel and get her one of those bears! As I sat in the car for the next few miles, the idea grew.

This would be no ordinary bear....I was to name her "Stella Bear" and once in Atlanta, take her to be with Memama so that when the time came to give her to Blair I could tell her that she had been with her Memama in her last days. Maybe it's just a girl thing or silly to some, but I am hoping that Stella Bear will bring my Blair a small bit of encouragement that her Mama was thinking of her constantly as I walked with my Mama, her Memama, through her last days.

And, that's not all. MY grandchildren will KNOW of their godly legacy in their great-grandmother, Memama, because Stella Bear will also be at my house waiting to tell them all the wonderful stories of how Memama loved and served her Jesus all the days of her life.

Be a Yes Woman or Man

2008-12-26T11:00:00.020-05:00

The Hopper family Christmas night tradition we adopted years ago (once we started staying in Charlotte instead of going to GA where both of our families live) is to go to a movie as a family. Last night, we went to see "Yes Man". You may not like Jim Carey, and I will certainly admit that some of the language and scenes were not to my liking. However, the overall message of the movie was a good one: embrace life by saying yes more often than not. I won't share anymore details in case you want to go see it.

I headed to bed not too long after arriving back home once I finished up the dishes from Christmas dinner....since there wasn't enough time to fully clean up after the meal AND get to the movie on time. It had been a good but exhausting Christmas day for me filled with alot of cooking. We were blessed to have 12 around our dining table this year, 6 of which were outside of our family.....more on that in a separate blog.

As is often the case when I sleep hard, I dreamed...this dream is, I believe, somehow "significant". For those who know me, I know you are probably laughing right now because "significant" is a word that is.....well "significant"! The significance is found in how the Spirit seemed to take the message of the movie and apply it to my life spiritually. The summary of the dream is that I along with some other believers were seeking to say "yes" to living in the presence & power of the Spirit constantly. What a concept! It was amazing, so real and believeable...in other words, it seemed like it could really happen.

In the "Yes Man" movie, Jim Carey is stuck in what I'd call "No-Land"....he says no to everything and is therefore in a big-time rut, and it affects everything in his life, from his dead-end job, to his failed marriage, to friendships, and the list goes on.

Hmmm....how many times (aka: weeks, months, years, even seasons!) have I been stuck in "No-Land" regarding living life in the Spirit and much because of my preconceived notion that it's just not do-able?! I think to myself, "it's just too hard" or "there's too much opposition."....both of which are so true, but that doesn't mean it's not do-able!...which is what my dream depicted: the reality that there is going to be difficulty (saying yes seems to inevitably bring what is at first hard but eventually turns out good....that sounds alot like Romans 8:28 to me) & opposition (from others who don't know Jesus as well as some who do but are choosing to live what I call an "in the box" believer's life). It was astounding to me to "see" myself in the dream living in a way that was saying "yes" to everything the Spirit was saying to me and prompting me about. And, it was so cool to see the COMMUNITY of believers that were around me seeking to support one another in living this way. At times, we would "lose" someone to one of the other groups, but then after observing our "yes lives", some would return. Each victory, great or small, was genuinely celebrated together.

Generally-speaking, the dream depicted this life as a battle....not surprising since that's how Scripture also describes it...see Ephesians 6:10-18. Often times in the dream, the in-the-box believers and/or not saved group would try to "mimic" the Spirit-filled life...in other words, it was a counterfeit version. And for those who were "lukewarm" (see Rev. 3:15), this imitation was very enticing. Those of us who had been convinced to live life saying yes to the Spirit would have to work hard at not working hard to do the work that ONLY the Spirit can do in the lives of those who were lukewarm.

The final detail of the dream is really important.....because at the start of the dream was a conversation I was having with my husband who was sharing with me that the Spirit had basically impressed him with a message that said, "Sherri's about to have to go through something hard, and although you are her husband, she will have to go through this on her own." Don't misinterpret me here....not alone in that Neal couldn't support me in prayer and other ways, but my understanding at this point is that it was going to be MY battle, not his and that it was going to get harder before it got easier.....something the Spirit made evident again and again throughout the dream. I think this is important for me AND you to remember....we don't live our believing lives joined at the hip with someone....we EACH have our OWN personal life with Jesus.

I awoke with a sense of renewed hope as well as a realistic understanding about living my life saying YES to Him. How incredible that my BIG God can take something as INsignificant as a secular movie and use it in a profound way?!

The Christmas Pageant

2008-12-11T16:27:00.002-05:00

I don't know who "authored" this, but it's just too great not to share! All you "mama's " will sooo identify.
Enjoy & Merry Christmas!

THE CHRISTMAS PAGEANT

My husband and I had been happily married (most of the time) for five years but hadn't been blessed with a baby. I decided to do some serious praying and promised God that if He would give us a child, I would be a perfect mother, love it with all my heart and raise it with His word as my guide. God answered my prayers and blessed us with a son. The next year God blessed us with another son. The following year, He blessed us with yet another son. The year after that we were blessed with a daughter. My husband thought we'd been blessed right into poverty. We now had four children, and the oldest was only four years old. I learned never to ask God for anything unless I meant it. As a minister once told me,"If you pray for rain, make sure you carry an umbrella."

I began reading a few verses of the Bible to the children each day as they lay in their cribs. I was off to a good start. God had entrusted me with four children and I didn't want to disappoint Him. I tried to be patient the day the children smashed two dozen eggs on the kitchen floor searching for baby chicks. I tried to be understanding when they started a hotel for homeless frogs in the spare bedroom, although it took me nearly two hours to catch all twenty-three frogs. When my daughter poured ketchup all over herself and rolled up in a blanket to see how it felt to be a hot dog, I tried to see the humor rather than the mess.

In spite of changing over twenty-five thousand diapers, never eating a hot meal and never sleeping for more than thirty minutes at a time, I still thank God daily for my children. While I couldn't keep my promise to be a perfect mother -I didn't even come close...I did keep my promiseto raise them in the Word of God. I knew I was missing the mark just a little when I told my daughter we were going to church to worship God, and she wanted to bring a bar of soap along to"wash up" Jesus, too. Something was lost in the translation when I explained that God gave us everlasting life, and my son thought it was generous of God to give us his "last wife."

My proudest moment came during the children's Christmas pageant. My daughter was playing Mary, two of my sons were shepherds and my youngest son was a wise man. This was their moment to shine. My five-year-old shepherd had practiced his line,"We found the babe wrappedin swaddling clothes." But he was nervous and said, "The baby was wrapped in wrinkled clothes." My four-year-old "Mary" said,"That's not 'wrinkled clothes,' silly. That's dirty, rotten clothes." A wrestling match broke out between Mary and the shepherd and was stopped by an angel, who bent her halo and lost her left wing. I slouched a little lower in my seat when Mary dropped the doll representing Baby Jesus, and it bounced down the aisle crying, "Mama-mama." Mary grabbed the doll, wrapped it back up and held it tightly as the wise men arrived. My other son stepped forward wearing a bathrobe and a paper crown, knelt at the manger and announced...

"We are the three wise men,and we are bringing gifts of gold, common sense and fur."

The congregation dissolved into laughter,and the pageant got a standing ovation. "I've never enjoyed a Christmas program as much as this one,"laughed the pastor, wiping tears from his eyes. For the rest of my life, I'll never hear the Christmas story without thinking of gold, common sense and fur." My children are my pride and my joy and my greatest blessing," I said as I dug through my purse for an aspirin.

BUT GOD is so good.

2008-12-06T11:56:00.004-05:00

Earlier this week, I was sooo sick with the flu ( or something?)....it came on suddenly IN the car (yuck) on the way home from being in GA for the Thanksgiving holiday. Barely made it in the door before the worst hit....no further details required! About mid-week I started to feel human again. Being sick is sooo....no fun.

BUT GOD is so good. He brought me through the sickness. It wasn't cancer or some other terminal health problem. I am keenly aware of that fact because my sweet 83 year old Mama has advanced bone cancer. When I'm around her (she lives in Atlanta & I am in Charlotte), I am blessed because I see her persevering in the midst of a GREAT trial. Last Saturday was particularly hard on her. She was in excruciating pain...so much so that she was screaming and asking Jesus to take her home. At one point, she even accusatively asked me, "Don't you care?!" I didn't take her comment personally because I know my Mama knows that I love her and that I do care immensely about her. But the pain was talking at that moment. Later when the pain meds finally kicked in, she was resting easier and I was on my knees beside her chair laying my head on her chest, she said in that Mama-like way, "I pray you NEVER have to experience pain like this." My reply...."If I have to Mama, I hope that I will be able to remember how strong you were and that if you could endure, then so can I."

In the midst of so many health challenges, sweet Stella chooses to focus on the good things in her life. She has her down moments for sure, but she's an amazing woman of God who's lived her life before me with all its many ups and downs, all the while trusting her God and displaying His glory as over and over again she chooses joy.

Today, to my surprise, a little bit of my Mama came out OF me.........the plumber had to be called earlier this week because of an outside water leak. An opportunity to worry & complain or choose joy & trust. Which will I choose this time? (another "to my surprise").... I let my husband make the "call" about how he should handle the details of this situation (I reeeeally have to work hard on the submitting thing due to a very strong sin nature in this area!!!). Because Neal just couldn't make up mind about what to do and which plumber to use and what work he wanted him to do or not do (what an opportunity for decisive Sherri to force things!), the plumber didn't come yesterday. BUT, he did come today. When he arrived and walked downstairs to our basement, a gigantic mess awaited him. The toilet had overflowed and lots of "poo" and other wonderful things had found their way all over the bathroom floor and into the family room.

When Neal came upstairs to inform me of what they had just discovered, I raised my hands to my head and said, "Oh no!" But just a few minutes later, my mind began recounting all the blessings of the situation.......wait! who is this Sherri & what has someone done with the "old one"?!!!

1-we are having a large Christmas party at our house next Saturday, not today; it didn't happen next weekend!
2-we have a stained concrete floor in the basement so no carpet is ruined!
3-the plumber was already on his way today when the other problem ocurred! if he had come yesterday, another call to come out would have most likely cost extra money & there was no waiting to address the problem!
4-God has graciously provided some extra income through Neal's sales, so there is CASH to pay for it! THIS IS HUGE because we NEVER have extra money!
5-it didn't take me days or weeks to have this perspective! wow, God reeeally is still working IN me!

There are just sooo many issues in this life to juggle, aren't there?! I know. I understand.
BUT GOD is so good!

The Origin of "Xmas".....be informed before reacting

2008-11-18T18:36:00.003-05:00

As believers, before we jump to conclusions about the use of "Xmas" instead of "Christmas", we all need to be informed! I know I am certainly guilty of sometimes reading something that was forwarded, passed on, and putting "stock" in it when I've not taken the time to check it out. Or in some cases it might be something I just always assumed was true or wrong or whatever it is I've thought for as long as I can remember.

"Xmas" is a perfect example of how we need to be a thinking people who check things out for ourselves.

I encourage going to the attached link and reading the article:

http://www.cresourcei.org/symbols/xmasorigin.html

To be a turtle or not....

2008-11-18T13:54:00.001-05:00

What a journey filled with changes I've been on this past year! If God had revealed to me what was ahead, I certainly would have pulled my head inside my shell, given my turtle-like ways! Am I THANKFUL that He's the One who's omniscient and not me!

I've been implementing a new approach to studying the Scriptures in my "Him time", idea courtesy of my husband via John MacArthur....his Bible teacher/hero. MacArthur challenges his listeners & students of the Word to consider reading a partiular book of the Bible all the way through every day for 30 days (this works for the smaller epistles easily; for longer books, they would need to be divided up into sections).

So, because I've seen my Neal grow to have such a great command of Scripture, I decided I needed to reconsider another of my turtle-like ways (taking a very slow approach and making lists, digging out the Greek or Hebrew meanings of words, cross-referencing, etc.), and give it a try. I have to admit that the first 2 weeks were the hardest. But there seems to be a "hump" to get over, and once past that, I really began to see the value of this "method" of study.

I've actually been in the book of Galatians since about the 20 something of October, but because I hadn't completed a full month, I decided to continue through November. And, I'm amazed at how the Word is getting IN me. Equally astounding is how the Lord is using it right where I am in my walk with Him and showing me how to apply the specific truths He's teaching me.

I don't necessarily believe this method is the way I will study for the rest of my life. But for now, the Spirit is prompting, so I'm yielding and God is rewarding me with a fresh richness in His Word.

This CHANGE should NOT come as a suprise to me since 2008 has been totally about uprooting just about everything in my life from changes with our immediate & extended family life, our church life, and my work life. Because all of those are wrapped up in my spiritual life and vice versa, it's no wonder that He would challenge me with a new way of coming to Him each day to hear from Him as I open His love letter to me.

If your Word life (aka: Quiet Time, study time, Bible time, whatever you call it!) is stale, then perhaps it's time to consider................whatever it is HE shows you! And how might He do that????

Look around you...who do you know that seems to have a good command of the Scriptures? who walks the walk as well as talking the talk? who has consistent joy? who, as some put it, "get it"? who do you see loving others espeically those unlike them? who do you see that's not on a constant roller coaster ride spiritually & despite circumstances, displays a stability & peace that you long for? Answer those questions and you might be surprised what you find out when you ask, "when you open up the Word, are you are turtle or not?"

A Proverbs 17:22a moment

2008-11-03T09:14:00.000-05:00

Neal & I often wonder what it will be like when we are living with Jesus in eternity as far as our sense of humor & laughing goes. My husband absolutely LOVES to laugh and he has been sooo good for me since I tend to lean toward the serious side of things.......seriously! Among many other things, the Lord knew I needed to have a counterpart that would lighten me up!

I just love seeing Neal laugh. I love it even more when he laughs so hard that he loses his breath! He'll start walking around with his hands on his hips to straighten himself up to get more oxygen into his lungs. I'll never forget one night at Pizza Hut in particular when Trent went into one of his movie quote routines from The Nutty Professor. Neal was sitting on the inside of the booth, and he almost shoved me on the floor trying to get out so he could get up and walk so that he could breathe! It was hilarious! We all got so tickled at him laughing that we ended up crying from the intense laughter. Thankfully, the restaurant wasn't too crowded, but those who were there must have thought we were crazy! Neal's best friend, Jeff, told him a joke not too long ago that had the same affect on him, and he had to walk downstairs to get away from Jeff to try to regain his composure.

What is it about laughter that is soooooo good for us? I'm not exactly sure from a technical medical standpoint, but I do know that God says that "a joyful heart is good medicine" or literally "causes good healing". Hmmmm.

With that said, I just have to share a joke.....and credit where credit is due....thanks Tori for forwarding this one!

Three Ladies in a Sauna

THREE WOMEN, TWO YOUNGER, AND ONE SENIOR CITIZEN, WERE SITTING NAKED IN A SAUNA. SUDDENLY THERE WAS A BEEPING SOUND. THE YOUNG WOMAN PRESSED HER FOREARM AND THE BEEP STOPPED... THE OTHERS LOOKED AT HER QUESTIONINGLY. 'THAT WAS MY PAGER,' SHE SAID. I HAVE A MICROCHIP UNDER THE SKIN OF MY ARM.

A FEW MINUTES LATER, A PHONE RANG. THE SECOND YOUNG WOMAN LIFTED HER PALM TO HER EAR. WHEN SHE FINISHED, SHE EXPLAINED, 'THAT WAS MY MOBILE PHONE. I HAVE A MICROCHIP IN MY HAND.'

THE OLDER WOMAN FELT VERY LOW -TECH. NOT TO BE OUT DONE, SHE DECIDED SHE HAD TO DO SOMETHING JUST AS IMPRESSIVE. SHE STEPPED OUT OF THE SAUNA AND WENT TO THE BATHROOM. SHE RETURNED WITH A PIECE OF TOILET PAPER HANGING FROM HER REAR END.

THE OTHERS RAISED THEIR EYEBROWS AND STARED AT HER. THE OLDER WOMAN FINALLY SAID.........WELL, WILL YOU LOOK AT THAT....I'M GETTING A FAX!!

I don't know about the rest of you, but I definitely got a cup FULL of medicine today!

Mental Wedding Snapshots

2008-11-02T16:02:00.000-05:00

Hard to believe my baby girl has been married close to a month now....as she used to sing when she was a country music lover, "Time marches on....Time marches on...."

I keep meaning to get it down in writing some of the mental images of that special October 4th day in Wilmington, but have been too busy the last week or more, but I finally have a minute to re-engage as a blogger....

Cherished & unforgettable moments:
-seeing her "vintage" dress hanging on the armoire in the B&B we stayed in....it looked as if it should have come with the rental of the room

-running into The Limited with Blair to find her something to wear for the bridal luncheon & literally buying it with her wearing it as we ran out the door....late as usual and I'm the Mom of the bride! That Blair was present overshadowed any possible stress & negative emotions....so what if we were late....we were being late TOGETHER (along with T.J., of course)

-seeing the bridesmaids surrounding Haley on the B&B front porch as they covered her & Lee in prayer....what gifts Haley has in these many precious friendships! She is soooo blessed!

-seeing Haley & Lee dance at the reception....this is the same boy who swore he would NOT dance...ever....period! And yet, the love of his life wanted him to, so he initiated taking dancing lessons (of course me, the Mama lama, paid for them!). Still, he laid his preferences aside because he knew how much it meant to Haley. Good form, Leeroy!

-watching Lee demonstrate his love for Haley by doing something extraordinary...his second act as her husband (2nd only to taking communion with her)....washing her feet. He had called weeks before to ask me what I thought of his idea. My answer? who am I to discourage anything that the Lord has laid on your heart?! Haley was definitely caught off guard, but held her emotions together..surprisingly. It was so precious to watch them have this incredibly intimate conversation as the rest of us looked on in awe & with tears streaming down our cheeks. It was if God gave them the ability to forget everyone else, and just focus on the moment. What a gift!

-stooping down to bustle Haley's wedding dress was such a pleasure & joy for me ( all 22 ties!!!!)....most would think that odd, but for those who remember, I was too sick to do this for my Blair when she got married in June 2006. I had just had major surgery and barely made it to her wedding. I missed much of what a Mom of the Bride does in the last 2 weeks and the day of. Oh, I was and still am grateful for all that God did during that time and yet part of me yearns to be able to go back in time and "do" for Blair as I was able to do for Haley.

-watching Trent escort his precious Ali down the aisle and see him take her hand and kiss it as they parted to take their places on stage.....those two seemed to ease into marriage like a hand into a glove!

-hearing my son-in-law, James share great family memories as he performed the ceremony; he did such an unbelievable job and even managed to work our beloved but deceased pet, Lizzie (aka as a "warrior" to James!) into the script! James has an uncanny knack for evoking laughter & tears all in the same moment....he is a born writer and speaker and he made Haley & Lee's ceremony forever special....not just plain special when you talk about something for a few days or weeks and then forget, but "forever" special so that we will all remember it permanently.

-Brian Few opened the ceremony & has played an important role in both Haley & Lee's lives. Though he didn't get to share as much or for as long as James, he made an idelible imprint on my mind as he challenged Haley & Lee to have their home be known as a house of FORGIVENESS. What an amazing concept to charge this very passionate couple with. Such wisdom. He obviously knows them well. Like Haley has said repeated to me, "Mama, when it's good, it's great and when it's bad, it's reeeeeeally bad.!" Ah, the Haley apple doesn't fall too far from the Mama tree!

Oh Father, take this union of these 2 sinners just like You did with Neal & me and do something glorious for Your name sake! Amen & amen!

PurposeFULL Days

2008-10-22T16:55:00.000-04:00

Ever have a span of time when you just feel more purposeful? The last week or so has been like that for me, and I've been wondering about why that is. So, I've recounted what I've done lately that's DIFFERENT than other weeks....

Last Thursday night, I spent time with a young single woman who needs encouragement in her relationship with Jesus. She's just spent the last 2 1/2 years overseas for the sole purpose of sharing the gospel, and now that she's "home" or really more accurately, state-side, she's struggling to transition back to American life. She's like another daughter to me, so it was my joy to just hang out with her and drink coffee at Caribou and catch up with her.

On Monday night, I spent the evening listening to & sharing with other women who are seeking, like me, to intentionally walk with God and do so authentically. We shared a meal together and encouraged one another.

Today, I met the same young woman from last Thursday for an early lunch to share more time together. God seems to be unfolding a new opportunity for us to spend regular time together. She thinks it's me investing in her, and I am doing that, but she's giving me far more than she realizes! (see previous 3 blogs to understand!) It was such an encouraging time to hear her heart as she shared about what's going on...in her relationships, in her church life, in her work life....nothing is out of bounds. I so love spending time with people who don't have it altogether spiritually-speaking, BUT they have a true desire to want to have God in the CENTER of it all.

So, what's different? People, not things, People, not stuff. People, not tasks. People, not me, me, me. I've never really thought of myself as a "people person" because deep down, I have a very quiet and shy side and have had to really work at being something other than that. I love having "me" time, being alone reading, just puttering around my house, shopping by myself, gardening by myself,.....it does not bother me in the least to be by myself.

However, although being alone is my natural preference, I'm realizing it doesn't completely satisfy the inner woman in me because God has made me to invest in others. Like the apostle Paul, I want to be "poured out" into others. So....it's not so much what I've DONE that's made the difference; it's WHO I've been with....

As I write, I'm reminded to glance over at a quote that I keep at my desk here in front of me. It seems to really fit with these thoughts. My youngest daughter, Haley, spent a summer in Bolivia doing mission work several years ago. The president of S.A.M., the ministry that sent her, made a statement to her and the others who had spent their summer doing the same thing all over the world upon their return as they were "de-briefed". It impacted me then when she shared it with me, and it continues to penetrate as I try to figure out how God would have me NOT waste my life in this last phase without children to raise.

Here's the quote:
"REAL ministry is getting close enough to people to show them how Christ can impact every area of their lives." Bill Ogden, S.A.M. president

Oh, did I mention that Haley lived in a Bolivian home with a single Mom and her daughter? She ate with them, she slept in their house, she helped them with their business.....all because she wanted to get close enough to show them how Jesus can impact EVERY area of their life.

Acting as if "then" is "now"...changing sheets for nobody

2008-10-19T22:06:00.000-04:00

I finally got around to getting the sheets washed & dried for all the upstairs bedrooms...which we have 3 of.....rooms that used to be full of activity, messiness and all the things that come with having kids in your house! The sheets for Trent's room had been washed & dried for weeks and laying on a chair waiting to be put back on his twin beds. Both girls' rooms have had people sleeping in them in the not-so-distant past; thus, the sheets needed to be laundered. However, I wasn't in any real rush to get it done nor to put them back on.....why? because as far as I know, none of the children will be coming home any time soon and no guests are coming any time soon either.

As I walked upstairs today, I figured I'd just throw the girls sheets on their beds, but make them up another day. Suddenly, I found myself laying across Blair's bed and once again reminiscing about days gone by that just seem to have disappeared like a vapor. Wow, the tidal wave was about to hit again, but this time, I didn't have the meltdown....although a melancholy spirit was lurking very nearby. Instead, I hoisted myself up quickly to make Blair's bed, walked to Haley's room to do the same and then finally to Trent's room.

I realized that much of my lack of motivation to get those sheets on the bed is simply because I'm not expecting anyone.......the operative word is "expecting"! Why am I not expecting anyone? Because no one has informed me that they are coming.

Hmmm.....there I go again trying to act as if I'm the one in control of my life when I know better! How do I know that the Lord won't send someone soon, maybe tomorrow, maybe next week to my doorstep in need of a place to sleep or stay? How do I know that He won't open a door for ministry that would require those rooms to be READY? That's just it; I don't.

Making those beds today was my small step of obedient faith, and I've realized in essence that I am saying in my spirit that I will "act as if then is now"! Providentially, I heard that phrase (boy does He have me hearing stuff lately right when I need it!) last Sunday at a new church that Neal & I were visiting. I pondered it at the time, wrote it down and even said to myself, " I think that's significant." I'm so glad that the Spirit is the One who brings to our remembrance truths that we need at just the right time in order to be strengthened & walk in obedience. I will intentionally act as if my "then" (which is me imagining having a full house of.....whatever or whoever God provides in His time in His way for His purposes) is my "now" and keep my eyes & ears open for new opportunities to use those ready rooms!

Thanks Lord for turning today's tidal wave into something worth remembering.

Goodbye is a necessary life skill....that I lack!

2008-10-15T18:09:00.000-04:00

I heard the quote that "goodbye is a necessary life skill" while returning from Wilmington to Charlotte the day after our youngest daughter, Haley, got married to Lee. I was listening to Beth Moore on CD which was just after having an emotional meltdown. It's amazing how fast those things can come on you!.....sort of like a tidal wave. One minute I felt ok, and the next I found myself in a puddle of tears wanting it (the wedding, Blair & James being home, etc) all NOT to be over.

It was so providential that I heard this particular truth at this particular time in my life becasuse this year has been absolutely FULL of goodbyes for me, and from my perspective almost more than I could handle....but the Spirit has reminded me that if I believe that, then I think that God has given me more than I can bear which scripture clearly teaches that He doesn't.

Still, 2008 has definitely had more goodbyes and more changes than any other year in my entire life. And it occurred to me that if I stink at goodbyes and want to hold onto my yesterdays, that I'm ultimately saying in my heart that Jeremiah 29:11 doesn't apply to me.....you know the verse about how God wants us to have a hope and a future. So often quoted, but I wonder how often really embraced. I know it's very hard for me to do so when I'm so enjoying the season I'm currently in. I just get soooo comfortable, and I sure love my comfort!

I guess that's been my problem really since Haley went off to college over 4 years ago....that was the beginning of the end of a season of a kind of mothering I've grown very accustomed to and very much enjoyed and drew great satisfaction from. Her getting married was like the click on the lock of the door. It's not that I'm not still a mom; it's just that my role as Mom to married adult children is very different. Nurturing is my "thing", but I think it's time to find a new way to channel that for God's glory, and I know in time that He will reveal what He desires the next season to be all about.

The bottom line seems to be not letting myself be ruled by my emotions and how I feel, but rather walking according to the truth I know from His word about Him and how much He truly desires that growing yada intimacy with me. Like my Neal, who is so excited to have his wife back after 25 years of being both fulltime Mom & wife, I'm wondering if the Lord might be a little excited too over the fact that one of His beloved is a little less distracted so she can be a little more focused on the lover of her soul.

All because Blair told me to....

2008-10-13T16:11:00.000-04:00

This is my first "blog attempt".....my daughter, Blair who's close to being 24, said to me recently, "Mom, you need to start blogging." Hmmmm. For some reason, this 2nd child of mine seems to have a power over me that's almost mystical. Must be a "middle child" thing! Blair, if you're reading this, then realize that there's finally some perks to being the middle c! You have power over me, the Mama!

She's serving overseas telling others about Jesus alongside her husband of 2 1/2 years. And ever since she left 5 loooong months ago, it's like whatever she says I need to do I really consider and somehow end up doing it! I don't know if it's the Mama in me wanting to do something for her because she's done something radical with her life or what.....

For example, she told me I needed to let my hair grow out.....no big deal, right? It would be except for the fact that I've kept my hair short-short (no other person on the face of the planet could wear their hair this short because they'd look bald; however, I have been blessed with 5 times the average person! It's sooo thick, every hair dresser who's ever cut my hair says I have the whitest scalp they've ever seen all because the sun can't get to it!). So Blair said grow my hair out; therefore, last December just before Christmas, I got my last short-short haircut and have been going through the painstaking process of letting it grow out. What an ordeal! Oh, I'm liking it now, but not so much through the process.

Another example is that she told me a few days before she & James left that I needed to start the business I've always wanted to do, and by the time she came back for her sister, Haley's wedding (which just happened on Oct. 4th btw), I'd better have done it. And guess what? Yep, I did what she said and have taken a meager stab at starting a new business with my best friend, Tori. It's been "on hold" temporarily, but we plan to get back on board soon.

Starting a blog is the most current example, and it's pretty obvious that I've complied with her suggestion once again! Which has gotten me to pondering something about the Lord... but first, why the name "yada-mama"?

The reason is 2 fold:
I, by no means, have a corner on the word "yada", but I do consider it "mine" for alot of reasons. I've lost count on how many years ago that God did a new work in my heart that centered around the concept of "yada". But as my hubbie likes to say, here's the "reader's digest" version-

One of my favorite scriptures in the old testament of the Bible is Proverbs 3:5-6 that says,
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and don't lean on your own understanding. In all your ways, acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths."

As I was reading and studying those verses one day, it occured to me to look up the word "acknowledge" in my Strong's concordance because I couldn't seem to wrap my brain around what it really meant to acknowledge Him in all my ways. What I learned then is what has been affecting me ever since. In the Hebrew language, the word for "acknowledge" as well as "know" is "yada", and it means to know INTIMATELY. When I took the definition and plugged it back into the verse, it was as if God had struck a match in my heart! Probably more on that subject later, but suffice it to say that I've been on a "yada" quest ever since. I have a piece of pottery that I painted up in my prayer room that says "Yada Him"; the license tag on my car says, "Yada"; and all you conservative folks out there, hold on, I even have a tattoo on my right ankle that says, "Yada".....probably a mid-life thing, but I tend to lean toward the fact that it's a "God-thing" and makes for great conversation starters with all kinds of people!

The "mama" part of the blog name is simply because "mama" is who I am and what I've been for almost my entire married life. Trent, my oldest, just turned 25. I've been married 27 years. Being "mama" is what I've known and done the longest of anything since being an adult besides being a wife. And now in my 50th year (no I'm not 50 yet, but Neal reminds me frequently that I am living in my 50th year!), all 3 of my babies are grown & married and I'm scratching my head and saying, "Now, what?" It's so raw and fresh because my baby, Haley, who just turned 22 got married 2 weekends ago, and 8 months of intense but glorious wedding planning is now over! What's a mama to do with herself? I guess time will tell.......

Back to what I've been pondering over about the Lord.....what if I started considering the Lord's "suggestions" like I've been considering my Blair's? Hmmmmm and ouch. She says, "Mom, I think....." and I'm on it. But what about when the Spirit prompts? Wish I could say yes, but I don't think I can......next thought......how come? What drives me to "do" for Blair?....that's easy. My love for her! Man, I love that girl soooo much as well as her hubbie, James as well as Trent (and Ali, my "new" daughter!) and Haley (and Lee, my "new" son!). Tori laughs at me all the time because I'm so ridiculous about how much I do for my kids. I'll do just about anything for them because God has placed an "I love you like crazy" kind of love in my heart for them!

Well, that brings me full circle to "yada"all over again. When I KNOW the Lord, really YADA KNOW Him, like He wants & deserves to be known by me, then I can't help but be crazy in love with Him and therein lies the secret to wanting to "do" for him, just like I've done for Blair.

There's another great old testament verse that says, "I delight to do your will O my God; your law (word) is my heart." The Spirit has been bringing that to my mind alot lately, and I think it's because He's wanting to remind me that doing for Him can and should be my delight, and the path to that delight is through His word which is where He taught me all about yada-ing Him in the first place.

Seeking afresh to Yada Him!